What are you looking for?
Featured Topics
Select a topic to start reading.
Ariana Grande has recently released a song called ‘thank u, next’ and wow, this time 3 years ago I would’ve been all over this song and related so much to the whole concept of thanking someone for their time and just finding someone new. I was stuck in a place where I wanted to be in a relationship and so had 0 standards and would accept whoever I got with no matter how badly they treated me or how much they brought out the worst in me. I spent time growing up in toxic relationships that ended in me being upset and losing the bond I’d formed, not a bond of love, or care, but a bond of dependence and feeling as though I needed someone to lean on constantly.
However, right now, 2018, 7th November, the only line of the song that sticks with me is ‘wish I could say thank you to Malcolm, cos he was an angel’, obviously this part is about Mac Miller which is heartbreaking and I really hope Ariana has the strength she needs right now. To me, though, this line stands out because I feel that right now, except I CAN say thank you. I’ve met my angel, I’ve met the person I want to spend my entire life with, someone that treats me how I deserve, that cares, that makes me smile constantly, that looks out for me and that isn’t toxic for me in the slightest.
I’ve mentioned him in previous posts, I call him Dobby. All of the things Ariana states she gained from her exes in this song, ‘one taught me love, one taught me patience and one taught me pain, now I’m so amazing’ I have gained from this one person. I haven’t gained anything from my previous relationships except knowing my self worth – which I guess I did myself in the end.
Love.
He’s taught me to love, not just love but truly be in love. He taught me that it’s okay to put down my guards and let the love I have for him shine through like no other. He sees me at my lowest points, my happiest points and everything in between and still loves me exactly how he always has. I met him when I found the love for myself I was longing to find, and that only enabled me to share that with him. I love myself so much, it sounds crazy but I’m my own best friend and I have so much time for myself and know I deserve the absolute best, and I have it. I’ve never seen anything quite like him in my life, we have huge plans that I could only embark on if I loved someone just like I love him. Every day I think I love him more than I ever could, then the next it grows, and it amazes me each time. He comes from a family full of love and diverse people and they’ve all managed to put together this perfect individual that I’m blessed to spend so much time with. To me, he sets human standards so high, he makes me realise just how special one person can be. I thank my lucky stars for sending me him, and giving me the ability to love him the way I do. I only want the best for him…even when he does something to annoy me. He’s a priority in my life and I was so enchanted to meet him.
Patience.
He’s taught me how to be patient. I come from a very confusing family, some days were good, some not so good, but I’ve developed some bad habits from it. I used to argue with my mother quite a bit and be very, very immature just like she can be. One day at a time, he’s breaking down those habits with me. He teaches me how to think before I speak – because that’s exactly what he does. If he says something, he means it, and I never did before I met him. I would say hurtful things during rows because I am used to being melodramatic with my mother, but he’s taught me to only say what you truly mean. I’m still working on it, and I’m not perfect, but I have an amazing teacher. I don’t need to see Dobby everyday (as much as I’d love to), it’s nice to be patient, to miss him. It’s nice to know that someday we’ll be living with eachother every single day and so now is the time to be used to living alone and wait for the future to take its toll.
Pain.
He’s taught me pain. When you love someone, and I mean truly love someone, you feel every emotion they feel. If he’s sad, I’m trying to cheer him up but my heart is hurting because I can’t reach through the screen and grab him. Holding him when he’s sad makes me feel like we can do anything together, how even at his lowest points he lets me in, lets me experience the pain with him yet hold him throughout. We broke up once, for a few weeks. He was in a very low place and we were arguing quite a bit, he was being distant and it hurt me and things ended. I didn’t ever realise that I was learning how I’d be torn from him, and losing him hurt like no other. I felt pain, real pain, because I knew I was meant to be with him and couldn’t be. He came back, he realised and he came back and I’ve been with a much better version of him ever since (I didn’t realise he could ever get much better). I hesitated at first, for a few weeks I wasn’t sure if I should go back again when I’d been so sad but I knew, I knew I was meant for him and he was meant for me. We’ve been on a journey of growth since then and I feel as though we needed that break to come back together and grow so much with eachother.
Now I’m so amazing.
Now, we’re so amazing. We are just how I wanted us to be and everyday I feel so lucky to have him in my life. I love you Dobby, and I can’t wait to celebrate your birthday in a few weeks with you, I’m going to make it so special. You will forever be a priority to me and I’ll always consider you and making the best possible situation for you. Thank you, for everything. You’ve been a light in my life and I love being in love with you.
(If you’re going through something right now with someone but know you should be with them, it will happen. What is meant to be will always be)
If you see a comment that is unsupportive or unfriendly, please report it using the flag button.
More Posts
-
Girlfriend vs. best friend
I don't like my boyfriend's best friend. At first I liked him and thought that he was nice. But then one day when my boyfriend and I had a small fight, he inten...
-
my world is shattering, only I can glue it back together, problem is, ...
This semester has been hell, I feel like the world is crashing down around me and laughing as I struggle in vain to put pieces back together, and hold the shard...
This is so cute awe. :,)
Reply