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I’m tired of people being in my life. I know that humans are social creatures etc. but I simply just don’t feel comfortable being around people. There’s this part of me that just wants people to leave me entirely alone. If I were to be alone it would be beneficial for me, no more loud noises, no more judgment, no more stuck thoughts. I could be who I want to be without people telling me who they want me to be. I wouldn’t feel alone either because my loneliness couldn’t get worse than this, and honestly I don’t feel that feeling very often. Sadly I can’t be alone, no one has ever left me alone throughout my whole life. I will never feel like someone is not there and that’s the problem, I can’t talk to that person, I can’t describe the pain I feel or the frustration. I can’t hug them because well, I hate them, I don’t want to hug them. I want to hug someone... There are no someone’s I could hug. I don’t know if I’m making any sense but I just can’t figure out how to naturally care about the people that people normally care about. Relatives, friends, etc. The only people I care about are strangers, people I have never met or hardly talked to, those are the only people I want in my life yet they aren’t and I’m stuck with people that I don’t even trust.
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I know how u feel....sometimes caring for stranger is much better cause u don't know them well . wanting to hug but have nobody to hug is the same wish for me. I somewhat am the opposite of u since I feel like people doesn't care about me what makes me lonely. But i'll tell u this (don't know if it will help).If u don't like people don't force yourself to love them , it will just make u more concerned . If people around u are the right people for u then u'll love them eventually . it's just the matter of normal feelings and hearts that connects to each other I don't know if that makes sense.
ReplyHey why not trying No-MAN! ;)
Next time you feel the same, try something different!
I ll be there for you!
With Love!
ReplyI do not know if you were an adult for adolescent. Forgive me I cannot tell by your tone because you were not specific about which friends family members or whatever that you have alienated yourself from because you hate them. I can tell you that as you get older you can always choose even now who you want to be you don't have to be who people tell you to be but that does not mean that even without friends and family people are going to stop telling you who they think you should be. I would like to disillusion you of that right now. I have a sister that is a little bit like that and what I know to be true is that family and friends and people who already have this picture painted of you and their mom will have their own opinion kind of formed whereas strangers only know the picture that you paint for them and that means that there are more likely to give you the advice that you want to hear.
You can reinvent yourself. You can acclimate. From what it sounds like you're an introvert which is someone who does not like to look outward and express themselves but is more focused internally. There are a lot of introverts in the world and a lot of people prefer plenty of space and alone time. Alone time can be very healthy it gives you time to work on you you can move to a city get a job that you choose to behave and how you want to be and fill your time up with enough activities at home in public solo or group to give yourself a happy life. But here's a little disclaimer nobody is guaranteed an easy life fairness or happiness however if you learn how to find happiness where you are you'll be all right
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