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Why am I never number 1?
2 months ago · · Lonely,
I am a very good friend.
I am thoughtful, empathetic, always there for my friends.
So why am I never number 1? Why am I always the person picking up pieces, but I am never classed as anyone's 'Best Friend'?
I feel like an after thought, my problems are never as big as anyone else's even though I quite openly struggle with anxiety and depression.
I am a single mother who has experienced massive life changes and events over the past 3/4 years, but no one ever praises me for carrying on when sometimes I just want to give up and die - to find peace.
I put my happiness on the back burner to make sure everyone else is ok and it is never really appreciated, I am always the second option.
I just want to be someone's best friend, not the person who gives good advice and that's it.
I don't know why people feel they can't get close to me when I openly invite them into my life with open arms, practically begging them to make me their best friend. I never do harm to my friends and I am fiercely loyal, yet my efforts hardly get recognised.
I am sick of social media and seeing every post pictures with their best friends. I am sick of calling people my best friend and it not being reciprocated. I am sick of not getting mutual support that I give out so freely and with love.
I feel surrounded by so many friends but I feel so lonely at the same time. I want to be somebody's number one.