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I didn’t realize that the day I lost Alize was going to be perfect
It was February 9 and the cold had finally let up and the snow was melting
It was hazy in Denver, which was different
Water was dripping and running as the snow melted
I cried most of the day
But the day was perfect despite my pain
I guess the world doesn’t care
But I do
I love you
I’m feeling so much
I want to hate today
But it’s so beautiful outside
Refreshing
Busy
Calm
Grey
I’m listening to Debussy
I don’t usually do that
I miss you
My heart hurts, my eyes hurt from crying
The mountains make me think of him even though we never hiked together
I just want it to stop but it comes in waves- everything makes me think of him
He was so beautiful the first time I saw him dancing
I didn’t know it would hurt like this
I would do it again
And again
But differently
You’d stay this time
I’m sorry
Wear my red coat and walk in the cold with me one more time
Please
I love you
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