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I'm pretty sure that my girlfriend of 10 years is asexual. I've just come across it as a concept and have done a lot of research over the last few weeks. Her behaviour is exactly as articles describe.
I'm currently preparing to discuss it with her and I'm pretty devastated really. I know I'm about to open a Pandora's box which cannot then be shut. I'm petrified if I'm honest.
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Whats asexual in humans? What exactly happens?
And I'm sorry:(
ReplyIt means a person does not find sex to be the most important thing in a relationship. They can still love, just as much as anyone else, they just prefer to cuddle or kiss, rather than having sex.
ReplyOh okay. That's not wrong though. I mean sex isn't everything
ReplyWhy do you think that? Does it really matter to you if she is? Asexual just means you don't find sex to be the most important thing in a relationship. It doesn't mean you love any less. And not to sound like a dick, but why do you have to tell her what she is? Or what you think she is? (Really don't mean to sound so condescending, sorry)
ReplyThat sucks. The obvious follow up question of course is, she might need to experiment with someone else.
ReplyNot quite... It's where you don't experience sexual attraction. At all. Like nothing. My girlfriend and I have sex about 6 times a year. And even then, it's like pulling teeth. If you think that's not something that needs discussing, then I'm clearly in the wrong place.
ReplyIt's not just a female thing. There can be a variety of things that can interfere with a person's sexual desire. Some people are insecure with their bodies or with themselves in general, some are insecure because of their lack of sexual experience, some are insecure with their sexual self and haven't embraced it yet, some are scared of being vulnerable and sexually intimate, and sometimes its problems related to trust.
Speaking from a woman's perspective:
Not to sound mean or to put you down, but maybe her sexual needs, wants & desires aren't getting considered or met. Some men can be really selfish in this department. If it's almost always about you and you alone, then that can be a big turn off for her.
Replyi dont think its something you should worry. finding ones sexuality can be strange but im pretty sure itll help her understand herself... and maybe help ur relationship...
Replylabels are overrated
ReplyIs she competing against porn? It can be a turn off for some women.
ReplyHi there,
Thanks for sharing your story. I think there are many people who can resonate with your story.
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Thanks so much,
Noor
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