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My Timed Entry
4 months ago · · Stress,
I keep everything to myself, whether it be my thoughts, my feelings, my experiences, my explanations, or my suggestions. I don't tell people things. At least, not anything that matters. All the time all I do is joke around with my friends, we make really stupid jokes about dark subjects and we all laugh it off. It's how we work. But those laughs are just a way to hide everything. If it weren't for the jokes, people would see how broken I am. But I can't show them that, I have to remain strong. When I do crack when people are around I hate myself because it means I wasn't strong enough. If I'm not strong, how am I gonna get through everything? I need to be stronger, I need to deal with it better, I need to laugh more, joke more. Maybe that way, I wouldn't break more.
I'm sorry if that seemed confusing, it seems confusing to me too.