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It’s dark
5 years ago · 0
108
It’s dark... really dark... the scent of fresh linens sting my nostrils. I’ve been in here for a while and I don’t know what to do. I think I hear someone outside. It’s a little cramped in here but I’m still alone. No one comes in and it’s always... dark. I am sitting here wondering why I don’t stand up and leave. Im not sad for myself because I know that I can leave. It’s hot and full with things I don’t want or need but I still won’t leave. I want to know why people judge me if I leave. Why will people change their minds about me. Was I always this way or am I a freak. If I leave, I lose my sense of belonging in the world even though I don’t. I’m stuck and I don’t know what to do. I’m stressed about what my Mom and Dad will say if I leave, what my sisters will say. I already know that my brother wouldn’t be like me and I accepted that. I want to leave. I can reach the handle from here. I’m stuck and I can’t imagine what’s it would be like if I left. I want to leave. I don’t want to leave. I want to leave so I can find someone who will love me. I don’t want to leave so I don’t lose the people who loved me. It’s a battle that I didn’t ask for. I never asked to come here. I never wanted to be stuck with this. It would be 100% easier off was just like the rest. But im not. It’s born hard to accept that I’m different. It’s difficult to leave this place. I’m fine with leaving but the people who I know aren’t. They’d don’t know im stuck here. Stuck in this cramped room full of last years jeans that just don’t fit right. its surprising. I don’t know how i ended up in here. I think to myself everyday if others around me are stuck as well but I just can’t see anyone. It doesn’t help me that im in love with someone I could never have. Not just because I am stuck here but because they aren’t here with me. They are obviously never going to be here. So alas I am stuck. Stuck in this... closet. Everyday wondering I felt I should leave just so I don’t hurt anymore. I’m stuck and I don’t know what to do.
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