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My Unsent Letter
3 months ago · · Grief, · Explicit
I miss you. Tbh it’s not like we spoke every day and hung out every weekend. I miss knowing you were there. No drama, no awkward friend shit, just there. I miss knowing that I could call you if I needed anything. I miss your voice suddenly echoing in my house randomly when you just came to pop in. I miss knowing you were in the tv room working on your laptop while I was in the other room. I miss hugging you and knowing that we are blood. I just Fucking miss you.
Fucking blood. I’m not one of those blood is thicker then water kinda people. Friends and family have always been equal to me. But fuuuuck. You were always there. Literally from the day I was born. I fucking idolized you. I’m angry. I’m angry because I’m finally in my 20s and I wanna get to know you more. I wanted to learn shit from you. I’m angry because you’re gone and this Fucking life must just carry on.
I’m angry because I was with you all Fucking December and then you decide to make a run for it when I wasn’t with you.
I’m angry because I watched you suffer so damn much. So Fucking much and now you’re just gone. Jesus, I couldn’t even have one more glass of wine with you?
I don’t know how to just carry on. Do this stupid monotonous life knowing you fucking disappeared into thin air. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK? I’m angry with you. For going when I wasn’t done getting to know you.