What are you looking for?
Featured Topics
Select a topic to start reading.
If you are in crisis and need immediate help, please call 1-800-273-8255 (NSPL) or text HOME to 741741 (Crisis Text Line). More resources.
I can't do this anymore. Every day spent in this environment, in this relationship, drags me further down to the point where every minute of my day is miserable. The only glimmers are when I meet with a friend or acquaintance, and I start to remember what I'm supposed to feel like; alive. For now I am dead.
I told her it's not working. We practically broke up three times, yet we're still 'together' - living together even. She admitted last time we fought that we've become just like friends. I think she's scared and that's driving her to go back on the arguments we had and try to find another path forward. I'm not her man. I don't want to be. Each day spent here when I think about us being apart it tears ME apart, but as soon as I'm out of the house, hanging out with other people, I'm fine.
I'm starting to realise that I'm not afraid of losing her, I'm afraid of hurting her. I know how she reacts when we get into this near-breakup arguments, she gets so hysterical and it pains me so much to see another person in so much fear and anguish that is caused by me. Later I realise, it's not my fault, but still.. that doesn't change my emotions and the hurt I suffer when I'm alone.
I think there is a storm coming. It had best be the last one, for the sake of myself, because after the last few I think one more is all that I can survive. She sees me as strong but I'm only strong in front of her, behind closed doors it's a different matter.
Something has to change. Soon.
If you see a comment that is unsupportive or unfriendly, please report it using the flag button.
More Posts
-
April 9th; You will always be missed
Wish we could change, how you felt. Wish we could talk, what you thought. Wish we could rewind the time, and support you, inspire you. At least, may be you w...
-
The Cliff That Was Tucked Away
The waves claw at the base of the cliff far below me, sea stretching as far as the eye can sea, it's colour resembles that of ink. I slowly remove my shoes, t...
It seems like you and her should sit down and really tell eachother how you feel and what you want to do whether you want to be with eachother,just be friends,or whatever.
Hopefully everything will work out between the 2 of you. If not theyre plenty of other people out there.
ReplyThank you
ReplyTalk to her about it and implement the change. Can't expect things to change without mentioning it and thinking it will change.
ReplyThank you. The thing is we already talked a lot, and it seems to make things worse every time. She gets very emotional to the point where I feel as though if I were to tell her how low I feel it could escalate her mood even further. We get left in this weird limbo. You're right of course though, change doesn't create itself.
ReplyI do think breaking up is the healthy thing for both of you, even though it's hard like you said. You seem like a really sweet person, and I totally understand how you don't want to hurt her feelings. However, the longer the two of you are together, the longer both of your time is wasted on finding the right person. Don't be afraid of letting her go, that actually is what's best for both of you if you are not the one for her.
ReplyI really appreciate your kind words, thank you.
ReplyNo problem, you're welcome. I hope things go well for you. :)
Reply