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There's a reason they call falling in love, falling. It fucking sucks. It hurts like hell and usually only one person falls. One person surrenders themselves to the relationship. One person feels the pain. And I'm that one person. I love him so much. I'm in love with him. I'd do anything for him, even if it destroys me. My love for him goes past all rationality and wanting him to have whatever he wants. And I won't stop. Others around me dont understand. They call me crazy, stupid, idiotic, but they don't understand. I will never stop fighting for him. I will never stop trying to make him happy, feel loved. And if it kills me so be it. Because if that's not love its bot worth fighting for. It hurts me so so so much. But I cant lose him. And nobody understands that because those who tell me to take their advice have never felt for someone. So no, I will not take your advice, I will not listen to you, call me what you want but i will fight and fight until my very last breath. And that's love. Love hurts.
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I think love is a little different for everyone. It could be falling hard and fast or something more gradual or something else entirely. Form what I hear you saying, you are caught somewhere in between liking being in love and also hating it a little? I hope you know that while falling in love can sometimes be messy, love can also turn out to be beautiful and it can be about sharing your pain, feeling loved and cared about just as much as showing it to someone else. Just give it time. Don't undersell yourself. Keep on fighting for your love just don't forget about the love you have for the other people around you - friends, family. Its not as intense and and in-fact a completely different feeling but its still love. while they might not understand where you are coming from and you don't have to take their advise but just remember they are coming from a place of love for you.
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