What are you looking for?
Featured Topics
Select a topic to start reading.
I used to struggle with the fact that some people did not take interest in being my friend. In my first years of high school I would question what was wrong with me for the 'popular' kids to not want to take me under their wing and be my friend straightaway. I was desperate to be in that group and finally made it there in my last two years of high school. Turns out it wasn't all that. I felt awkward, out of place, uncomfortable and struggled to voice these feelings to them. Why? Because they were not the friends I thought they were. They cared for eachother and I was just the newcomer, the person that would sit with them at lunch but didn't really know anything about them.
I got to college, same happened again. I met a group of friends who I formed such strong bonds with that I really did believe they were going to be my friends for life. But I wasn't being me, I was acting completely out of character to fit in with these people that I realised I didn't even recognise myself anymore. One of the girls, lets call her Anna, was similar to me, the real me, but also put up an act. I found myself often making excuses for why I couldn't meet up with these people and when we made plans I would be so self conscious about the smallest things. At a BBQ I would worry about consuming too much food as my friends were so slim that my curves made me look obese. I was insecure and lost in myself, I had 0 self respect and did not know who I was in the slightest.
I genuinely hit a point where I thought that I wasn't meant to have a friendship group because surely, by college, I would have found them already. Wrong. I always had one friend, lets call her Flip (inside joke) who I grew up with and was best friends with outside of education and we met a girl at work who I will call Az (double lol). When I lost my college friends and went through a breakup I found myself gravitating towards this girl at work, and Flip felt the same. We sat together at lunch one day and discussed plans for the future, how badly we all wanted to travel was brought up and we ended up agreeing on the three of us going together the next summer.
From that day, I found my friends for life. Flip and I already had an unbreakable bond and we had always struggled to let anyone else into our friendship, but Az was different. We gelled together perfectly and the next few months were spent us building bonds that we all know are going to last a lifetime. I realised that I was friends with two people who are non-judgemental, open minded and exactly the same as me. There isn't a day that has gone by in the past few years that I haven't spoken to them, they are the constant in my life and I don't know how I will ever repay them for the things they have done for me.
Before finding my true friends, like I said, I had 0 self respect and this showed when it came to relationships. I would let boys walk all over me and hide it from Flip, never daring to open up to anyone. Now? I have been built up to recognise that I am a beautiful, strong, independent woman who doesn't need to rely on any man. I love my boyfriend and I think the world of him but I didn't get with him because I needed to rely on someone, I got with him because he treats me how I deserve and knows my worth. The reason I know my worth is because of my two friends. At my lowest point they were my shoulders to cry on, mouths to big me up and ears to listen to my lack of confidence and unhappiness.
If I go to them feeling down within the next ten minutes we're on a group call sorting it out, booking an apartment and spending the night together. Same with them. They are two of the most beautiful, strong, independent ladies I know and I am so so so proud to be their best friend.
Sometimes in life you feel alone and you feel as though you don't fit in. I had this for so many years, over a decade of it. I finally feel accepted and at home with my friends. There is never an awkward moment, and when we disagree we voice it and are laughing again within an hour. Nothing compares to having friends that accept you - all of you. So don't settle for less. I did and it did nothing for my confidence.
Lots of love, a confident, happy and empowered young adult
xxxxx
If you see a comment that is unsupportive or unfriendly, please report it using the flag button.
More Posts
-
13 & 16
So my best friend (13 yr old) wants to date this 16 yr old boy. Everyone she asks about dating this kid despite the fact that she’s 3 years younger says that...
-
Nedd advise
My best friend recently made new friend and started ignoring me. They meet regularly. They look very close to each other I can feel that. I thought I don't want...