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I am writing this here, because i feel depressed most of the time so don't really want to bother my friends with this, It's very taxing listening to negative shit again and again and i get it, this platform has helped me so much, i know someone is going to read it, but there is no certainity of who and when also no certainity if it would be commented on, today i showed my parents a Gary Vee video on how one should stop Micro Managing, you know the first things that came out of my parents mouth were oh he is just showing off he is rich and then telling stories how, and oh look at him, he looks like 63 years or something, i am 46 and i look younger, your dad is 53 he looks younger than him. I am sick seeing their non-openness, i told them my whole point was not to attack you or anything Ma Dad it was just to open your perception to something you're not recognising in you which is a curse for me in my social and day to day life, it's easier said than done to leave these toxic patterns i learned as a surviving mechanism from my parents, i want to leave this behind, i am so scared to in a way, i am not able to let go and try out new things like talking to strangers and just trying to socialise, dating life is fucked, my sexual drive is driving me in the wrong directions hahaha, I am unable to date anyone whole life i am 19 now and feel i will waste my life believing in the shit i have been taught since childhood these toxic patterns, if you went through a similar phase what was it for you that pulled you out of your conditioning ?
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get a therapist or sum thing
Replyfirst of all, i love the name hahahaha !
I have been under therapy for past one year, hasn't helped me as much as i would like it to... No money for other therapists since the one i have is a college provided for free therapy sessions with a Clinical Psychologist.
ReplyI feel you 100% however i too have tried therapy and counseling for years. Ive been like this for 6 years and counting. I wish I had an answer but real depression is a hard thing to overcome. When I say real depression i don't mean the temporary type most people experience after a rough situation or event. I mean tbe kind that latches itself to your brain and doesnt let go.
Replyyeah man, feeling sad when you don't want to is fucked up.
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