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Lonely and sad. Yes, that's how I felt when you left the country and what I'm feeling right now as you have someone new in your life. I can't believe myself for holding on to this feeling. I think I'm losing myself for thinking a lot about you, about how much pain I've caused you. I hope I never crossed your mind. I hope you forget about me now. I don't deserve you. I don't deserve your love. This is what I thought. I don't know about you. I don't know what you think of me back then. I don't know what you think about me now. It has changed right. I know you hate me. You hate me for not reaching out and not handling a situation the way you want it to. I'm sorry if I couldn't talk to you. I'm sorry if I thought about deactivating my account would be better for you and me. I'm sorry if I didn't try and give myself a chance to get closer to you. I'm sorry if I didn't take the risk. Maybe that was my mistake for not accepting your feelings and ignoring it or maybe it was me being anxious about what everyone will going to say, or maybe it was me not wanting to look desperate just to be with someone. You made a move a couple of times but all I did was ignore it. If we meet again in our next life, I'll not let fear control me. I'll take the risk. I'll be brave enough to love you, to be with you. I know you have someone now, I hope she treats you better and give the love you deserve. I hope you are happy and healthy. You've move on and I should move on as well with my life. Goodbye.
-M.J.R.
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