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Why did I choose to get better for someone who doesn’t know what she wants
One day she tells me she wants to be with me
The next day she doesn’t know
It’s this war in my head cause I’ve been here before
But my bipolar depression yell that she is my lifeline
Which is retarded cause all she does is tell me what I want to hear rather than what she feels
She is my heaven and hell all in one
She is my destroyer and savior
I know I need to leave but I can’t
Cause if I do I know she will kill herself
I deeply love her
And she is my Venom
I don’t know how much I can take
I’m starting to wonder why god made me live even when I tried to die
I am so torn
I just want my mind to shut up and me to go numb
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Next time you’re outside, alone or in company of others, try to find as many shapes in the clouds as you can. Or do it everytime you’re outside and find at least one cloud that reminds you of something.
Moments to yourself are so very important. I hope you’re days get better.
xx
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