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On Sunday night, I found out that you were diagnosed with terminal stage 4 cancer. When I was a kid, your home was a safe place. I could go there and do what I want, play with the toys or watch a movie. You were a big part of my childhood. When I was 5, grandma died. After that, I went to your house and I felt her with me. I miss her so much even though I only have one memory of her. When I was a little older, you introduced Cindy to us. I loved her granddaughters and I'm still very close with them today. We have all come so far. I'm heartbroken that you will soon leave my life. Sure, you can be an asshole and a major alcoholic but still. I can barely sleep at night and I cry a lot. There is a lot going on in my life and it has gotten a little bit harder. Emily is heartbroken too. I don't know how much time you have left, or any of us for that matter. Anyone could die tomorrow. I haven't had to deal with the death of a human being that I'm this close to. When your son, Cameron, died, I was sad but I was only close to him when I was little, If even then. I'm sure that this is hard on you or maybe you've forgotten because that's what you always do. You drink it away and that's what you've done for years. I don't know. You probably won't see me graduate college, get married or even meet my grandkids. You were someone that I always thought would be there, I guess that I was wrong. I'm sorry.
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