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So I'm a 19 year old virgin. I've NEVER been in a relationship, not even on a date, still no first kiss either. Yes, I've texted guys before, but always end up blocking them because their perverts. I have daddy-issues, so when I do feel like I'm getting close to a good guy, I push them away immediately. You know.. the basic self-sabotage concept. No men have shown true interest in me in a really long while. I get REALLY lonely and will go on a binge of romantic comedies (yes even the cheaply made indie bad back wood movies free on youtube). I am also a very tall woman with a slight curvy figure (no not in all the right places-in my opinion) and I just feel so insecure around everyone. Ugh I make jokes about forever being alone, but at this rate I think it might actually com true. Yes I've tried dating apps, and I will no longer. Someone pray for me or cast a love spell for me or something. I'm so tired of being alone.
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Trust me . Don’t be in love . You’ll become mad then . And if they ever leave you . Done you’re broken.
ReplyI think you may have written this post from my perspective😂 don’t panic- I spent to long panicking, now I couldn’t care less-I’m 20 now btw
ReplyUhm for me, maybe it's still not the time for you. And still you're still 19! That is still very young. Why don't you enjoy yourself and have fun at that age. And if you really want to meet "the one", don't rush. Everything that comes easily can be taken away easily too.
ReplyI can say with complete confidence that you won't be alone forever. Would it help as well if I told you that the loneliness and isolation you feel are felt by a LOT of people? I only say that to let you know that any feelings you might have that this is something uniquely terrible about YOU is NOT true. It's really really hard in our world to find and connect with people who are matches for us. It's a gigantic problem. Dating apps haven't fixed it anymore than any other attempt at fixing it has over the years. It remains a perpetual problem that it's damn hard to find those damn people that we REALLY connect with amongst all those that we don't connect with. They ARE out there. I guarantee you that. But what I've found is that the only solution is simply to meet a LOT of people so that you can sift through all the wrong people to find the right ones. It's not you. It just isn't. I think other people who you see that may be connecting more easily probably just settled - settled for those perverts. You also said you push people away - so one thing you might want to consider is working on that while finding a way to meet more people. It's great you're aware of it, maybe take the next step and try therapy so that when you do meet one of those people who are right, you're ready for them.
ReplyLove comes when you least expect it. Don't be searching because it will find you when you're ready ;)
ReplyIf you ever need anyone to binge romantic comedies with, give me a shout. Watch The Holiday if you haven't, because Jude Law is a SNACK. Jude Law makes everything better, trust me.
You won't be forever alone don't worry. Love is the shittiest thing in the world so take it from me, you're better off waiting to find someone you really like, and who really likes you, than trying to rush into things.
(but take my advice Jude Law fixes everything) xx
ReplyI tell this to myself and my close friends.
A significant other is not a requirement in life, not a goal in a game.
There is so much more to the world than a significant other. Don't be fixated on trying to get love for the sake of love.
Get out there. Meet new people, get new hobbies and interests, and more importantly, get to know yourself. Nobody should care whether or not you ever had someone or slept with anyone. Anyone who thinks that not being in a relationship is a negative point in who you are should be ignored.
Slightly less aggressively speaking, don't try to *find* someone. Trust me, you'll likely stumble upon them by accident and maybe not even noticing for a few moments why you like to hang out with them so much.
ReplyMy advice is be careful at your age being inexperienced can we risky. Older guys may not understand and take things fast so be clear on what you want. Tbh you arent missing much relationships suck right now. Also if you do find someone and have sex. Make sure he uses a condom. Accidents can happen. The pull out method isnt the best. The best thing right now i believe is to let someone come to you. If you want attention or someone you like to notice you. Maybe dress different. Smile. Being shy will not get you a date so try not to hide. Good luck
ReplyBro same except I'm seventeen. I dated a girl before, but otherwise no one has shown any interest in me. You will find someone. That will fit with you perfectly. You two will fall in a deep love and you will be deliriously happy.
Replyare you free to talk withme
Replycan i talk with you
ReplyGirl you are only 19 years old.
You sound like me when I was your age lolz. Like literally. I am tall and curvy too. I had yet to have my first kiss too around your age. But I also believed in saving my virginity until marriage.
I wish it had came true.
I was naive at your age and I was also very insecure about myself as well. For some strange stupid reason... I thought that I would always be alone and no man would ever find me attractive.
Take your time with relationships. Please. I wish I had. And if you are going on dates, please be careful. I know I probably sound like a mom... but I kinda wish someone told me these things at 19 too.
Do not drink around men by yourself, and always let someone know where you are when you go on a date. (I was raped by a 31 year old man right before my 20th birthday who was taking me out on a date and fed me liquor).
Focus more on building your self-esteem up. When you start to feel good about yourself, others will see that and you will attract the attention of men. Do not rush to lose your virginity, unless it is something that you really want to do. Good luck :)
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