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I have been fighting with my best friend since 2 months. He has started to ignore me and is filling my place with another person. And he denies this fact.
I am currently in my final year and had a lot of things that I planned for me and my bff. I wanted to enjoy every moment, make a lot of memories, click pictures, go outing and so on. It was all going well until we met a few fresher girls. He got extremely engaged with those girls, one in particular whom he considers his sister. I initially thought she was a nice person. But later found that she's been using his emotions for her benefits. When I expressed this thought to him he rebelled. He was angry at me for the first time in years. I was shook and then calmed myself and let that matter go.
As I am in my final year I had applied for internship in several places and finally got selected. This made me super busy making my bff and junior spend a lot of time together, that I missed noticing. Now that we have exams I am on leave. On returning to my original college routine I find that that Junior has successfully replaced me. The things we used to do, now I find them doing.
He picks her up daily from the bus stop (that is 100m away), drops her, has a lot of memories with her, pictures with her, he knows what time she has her breakfast!!! Originally we used to go together be it class, cafetaria, library, etc. But now I have no idea where he was. And whenever I ask someone, answer would be "near the junior class". He stopped picking my calls. He does not text me anymore. Even when I find reasons and text him when he is online (on WA) his replies are so late that I just get dissapointed.
Yesterday we had a big fight. I was so mad at him that I said something that shouldn't have. When I did not mention the junior girl at all, yet he started to defend her saying she is very nice, good and my sister and stuff I got mad. I asked if I was important or her. He had no reply. Again I said, "I think I should fight for what is mine and get it back and I will get it back." His immediate reply was "you are free to do anything but do not hurt that innocent girl." This hurt me extremely. We are bffs since yesrs and yet he thinks I will cause some hurt to a person😢.
Continuing the argument I said, "I know you can replace me anytime, but atleast replace a person with my standards." I think this hurt him. I spoke wrong I am aware of it. I have no right to speak on a person's standards. But I was equally hurt when he said " standards!" "You!!" Instead of saying "I never thought of replacing you." When we met today, we had strangeness in the air. Rather I felt coldness from his end. Actually when I was waiting for him in the library to sort out the misunderstanding about the previous day's fight, I saw him enter with the girl. He did see me. But he went straight to other juniors, sat with them and the girl for more than 30 mins. This made me super angry. So I decided not to speak about the fight as that would worsen the situation. He came to me once the girl left for some work. I spoke to him like I do with other casual friends for 1 min or 2. Then he said he had some urgent work and had to go to XYZ place. But after 40 mins when I was about to leave the college I find him and that junior standing and talking rather laughing. I did not utter a word and just left with sadness filled in me.
I still remember how our fights never lasted for more than 30 mins. And now 😢.
We have no feelings for each other. We are not lovers. But we are(were😕) bffs. Our friendship was envied by most of thr college. My lecturers envied our friendship. But now we have not spent 10 mins of happie moment.
I agree that I did not give my full attention towards him during my internship, but I made sure I spoke to him atleast one hour a day. I agree that I could not stop the girl from using him, but I did try.
My concern here is definitely about our future. But the bigger concern is I have my exams due in 4 days, and I cannot concentrate on studies for more than 5 mins. What do I do?! I thought of talking to him and sorting out. But he is not responding. How do I just handle this?!
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ReplyBecuase he will always be that.. even if he regards me as before or not😊
ReplyPut your exams first. Read what you should study over a few times and concentrate on it! Or do you want to fail? Friendships come and go through life and what is important now will be water under the bridge later and eventually he will become a past shadow in your memory lost and not to be found. You may be yesterdays' news which he has tossed away in favour for this girl with whom he is besotted. Don't worry about it. Get on with things and be happy.
ReplyThank you so much for your reply. I will definitely comcentrate on studies now. I will defintely work on my future now.
ReplyThank you so much for your reply. I will definitely comcentrate on studies now. I will defintely work on my future now.
ReplyThank you so much for your reply. I will definitely concentrate on studies now. I will defintely work on my future now.
Reply