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Call me an old-fashioned girl but I still believe in waiting till marriage. I know it's 2020 and times are changing but there's still a part of me who believes that sex should be between husband and wife. I'm not in anyway trying to judge or persuade anyone else's views but, I went on a date with this guy and we were hitting it off good. Well-mannered, attentive to my needs, he listened, took me to a really nice restaurant but wanted more .. I told him that I don't do hook-ups that i'm not that kind of girl and he looked shocked as if I were joking. He then said to me, why is it such a big deal it's just sex.. h*ll i've hooked up with many chicks in my college days and I asked when you say many ? like how many and he responded with " 40+ that I can think of " I really thought to myself how unattractive that made him. I've lost a couple dates all because I didn't want to randomly hook-up with guys I didn't know. As a young lady it really baffles me to hear other young ladies boast and brag about their body counts having over 20+ bodies not barely out of high school yet. It's a disturbing reality we live in
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First of all, not all guys boast about how many people they slept with and who will disrespect your personal request in regards to no sex. I suggest that you find someone who shares the same views as you and is willing to wait until marriage too. I had premarital sex, under age at the time and never boasted about my "body count" lol. However, I don't regret it at all and it doesn't bother me, why should it matter now?
We learn, grow from our mistakes and experiences. Life is full of unexpected challenges, experiences etc... And just like you, I thought I would wait until I was much older and married, this was when I was a young teenager. Obviously this wasn't the case for me at all and plans didn't go as I expected.
That is how life works and sometimes you can't control everything that goes on within your life. In my own personal opinion, I much rather had experiences in the bedroom, than not know what to do at all and be an adult. Does it make me a bad person in this case, not at all and why would it anyways?
Again, this is my life and I do what I want with my body. If I'm not hurting anyone and being irresponsible then, why would it concern anyone else? Don't forget I'm a full grown adult now, happily married to my husband who also had premarital sex and we have a great fulfilling sex life too. We're also expecting our first child and becoming a family.
If people have a problem with that, they can just screw off and mind their own business. Do understand this is just my perspective and it's not going to ever change. Overall, you should do what is best for you and don't let anyone try to influence your own personal choice.
_-Jas
ReplyI understand your perspective completely. I mean i'm in my early 20's and I still prefer to wait till marriage. I'm in no way shaming anyone and I hope it didn't come across that way
ReplyIt's alright to think that way, don't worry. If guys leave you just because you are not willing to hook up, they you don't deserve them. Wait, till you find a guy who respects your decision.
Replythen*
ReplyThe main reason males ask girls out is for sex. Males seem to have disrespect for every girl out there, and the girls give in. It's horrible. Or if they are in a relationship the male wants sex every time he's with his girlfriend. However, he can go out or be with another male and doesn't want anything from him. They can just enjoy one another's company and have a good time. It's too much for them to do the same with a girl. I have had many dates that end with an argument because I refused sex.
Replyit's most definitely frustrating, Like i'm in my early 20's and I'm still virgin because it's just a belief that I wait but guys that I have been outwith can't seem to respect it and it always led to an argument or someone getting blocked
ReplyKeep saving yourself. If you have sex before marriage, get pregnant, guy disappears, youd hate yourself for it. Not all guys are like that and i know some out there that feel the same as you do they dont want a slut thats been with every man in town either.
ReplyI agree with you don't sacrifice your standards I'm also saving myself for marriage it's tough out there stay strong!
Replyit just feels like some guys cause I've been out with a few guys that respected it for a certain period of time before they would try and pressure me into it and that would lead to a whole argument or me calling a ride home. It's super frustrating
ReplyHey don’t worry. I agree with you too. I also think the same way about this. And hey, let me tell you. If guys leave the girls because she can’t give this to him, then trust me, it’s better to be single. To me, virginity is like my pride and I respect myself a lot. So girl, yes. Be proud of yourself. If he couldn’t tag you along in your life because of it, then so what? I am proud to see there are girls like us, and I am proud of you for thinking this way. There are guys out there who understand and respect your decision in life.
ReplyOnce a gal gets married and has kids, she does not want sex anymore. Sex before marriage tries to address that. It does not work either way - before of after. Ring on - sex gone.
Replydid you understand the 'point' of her feelings, bro?
Reply