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I helped someone here today, and it helped ME a lot (: Reminded me some more of who I am as a person. I got so lost with myself and who I was for a long time, for YEARS it almost feels like.. But I'm coming back. I remember asking myself "When did I become such a little b*tch" lol like such a freaking crybaby weenie, you know? xD In high school, I had finally found my true self, only to lose her again in more depression. Thankfully it wasn't as bad as the first time (the time right before I found true self). This was second worse... God I'd never been so lost before in my life, so caught up in overthinking and mixed in with not thinking enough, getting drunk asf*ck and all drugged up, ugh, that crossfade was BAD! /:
But now, omg, now I feel.. refreshed, rejuvenated, like a brand new & reborn me, like an old me (the good one) but BETTER! Idk how this happened I mean gosh, I didn't even ask for this, but f*ck... It's like the bad*ss boss *ss b*tch is back, with some kind of swirl of good girl (kind at heart, beautiful deep down, in and out) who was always there. Just that now, I'm aware of what I can really be, altogether ^-^ It's perfectly possible to be a bad b*tch and a good person at the same time, to be confident without being cocky, super smart and a little weird without shame. The tricky part now is still this one last thing that has always been on the back of my mind (I mean, nobody's perfect, right? or else how boring would that be?) I'm lonely sometimes.
Yeah being single can be great and stuff, but I jus wana find someone who could match with/compliment my strong personality already. It's not everyday you find someone unique and open-minded like me. ok am I being a little too full of myself again? hehe.. but seriously, they say you look for things in potential partners that remind you of yourself, or that your partner is like your best friend. Who the heck would this be for me?! You would think being bisexual increases my chances but eh. I am still in search of this similarly magical and amazing person of mine, inside and out, whoever they are! <3 anyway, that's my life right now
the one and only,
SleepyBanana
[Omg you guys! My identity is DEFINITELY back, I almost typed my real full name for some reason!]
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Hey,
I love this! I really do. It's good to take a step out of your body every once in a while and dig deep. I'm glad you've found yourself. This makes me happy because people nowadays forget how dire it is to get to know ourselves before we get to know other people. Take life as it goes! I wish you luck, friend. Mayy you find what you're looking for on this earth:)
ReplyLol thank you for that (: thanks so much! :D
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