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My brother is the type of person who does care for you. But also, has very bad anger issues. He yells at me and stuff. I cry because I’m angry. He isn’t well economically right now because he lost his job due to covid. He now has another job but earns less. So he has asked me for money and I didn’t lent him some money. But recently he started being an asshole to me, he wants to go park my car i don’t know where because he doesn’t use it and I don’t use it because I don’t have my license. I had my appointment like 2 months ago but DMV closed due to covid. So I was like no don’t park it so far (what if they break in) ? And he was like well u don’t use it and I need the parking for me. So I told him u only think abt yourself!!! And he was like yea always gotta think abt myself first. This is an attitude he carries and every time he wants a favor he says “oh we’re family, family should always support each other” but then when I oppose to something like lending him more money because he’s an asshole he says I’m the mean one. I have said that I was going to stop with his manipulative self. He also tells me “we’ll get ur license already!” But I think he’s not comprehensive because it’s OBVIOUS I can’t right now if the dmv is closed. Like what am I supposed to do? Be understanding at least ??!!! *ugh* I have paid my car the one he used for a year while he was using it and he was paying the insurance and he honestly didn’t take care of that car at all. It’s so dirty, dusty, he polarized the windows for me but now that he doesn’t need it it’s like abandoned and dusty and I feel like I also did him a big favor because he used my car for a whole year since he didn’t have one; my dumbass is still paying for it. So how am I a bad sister? Now that he doesn’t need it and he has a new car he wants to park it somewhere else where it’s kind of far and I can’t easily check on it. Can someone please tell me how to stop feeling bad when I say no when he needs money ?
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If he already has a job that's paying, and you lend him money a lot, and he doesn't give it back, then stop giving him. It's YOUR money that YOU earned and it's non of his decisions whether you give him any money or not. If he's in an emergency, then give him money of course. But if he's only using it to buy snacks, cigarrettes, or anything bad, then don't give him. You don't have to feel bad. REMEMBER, it's YOUR money. YOU earned it. If YOU AND your brother earned it together, he could have some money, but you earned it YOURSELF, right? it's your money. it's what you deserve. you own the money. he doesn't have the rights to take it away from you. If he's being forceful and taking your money away from you, i think you should report someone (even if he's your brother,) because this is definitely a toxic person. When covid is finally over, try and go live somewhere far away from him, and don't let him know, because he might just come and ask for more money. But, since you cannot go anywhere now, (because of covid-19,) try and hide your money somewhere VERY safe, where your brother would never look, like your clothes shelf or something. But if he asks where it is, tell him you don't have any more money. Please. Be careful. Hope i helped.
ReplyThank you for taking the time to read this🥺 I appreciate it.
ReplyYou're always welcome! <3 Stay strong!
ReplyI will save up as much as I can
Reply