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It was nice to talk to you again.
I think I miss you, and I really am sorry for hurting you.
I guess I'm in the guilt part of the breakup phases. The one where you start wondering "Was he really that bad?" "Was it worth it to break his heart?" "Do you really want to be JUST FRIENDS with him?" "Are you gonna start liking him again and expect him to like you back, even after what you put him through?"
The reality is this:
N, you aren't a bad person. And you were a great boyfriend. But like every great person, you had some flaws. These flaws really hurt me. Enough to make me want to leave. I'm sure that if I had to marry you, it wouldn't be anywhere close to the worst thing in the world. However, I don't believe that you are "the one" and I think that there is someone better for both of us in this world.
Man, why does it hurt to say that? I'm the one who ended it, I shouldn't feel this way. I guess I'm just missing the good times, and guilt-tripping myself about the "wonderful relationship" I had.
I keep having to convince myself that yes, I wasn't happy. Like, was it really that bad? Yes, it was.
Why can't believe myself?
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The fact you thought it WAS bad means is WAS bad. If it wasn't bad, you'd never think it was bad.
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