What are you looking for?
Featured Topics
Select a topic to start reading.
If you are in crisis and need immediate help, please call 1-800-273-8255 (NSPL) or text HOME to 741741 (Crisis Text Line). More resources.
She has a boyfriend, her first boyfriend, her first kiss, her first makeout session, her first hickey's, her first year of college state away on her own, except for her new boyfriend. She met him two days ago. They went from meeting to making out. I try not to judge people out loud and I try really hard to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. Right now, I am simply overcome with loneliness and my best friend, my only friend, hasn't engaged in a an actual conversation with me in I don't know how long and she only talks to me when she's bored and has nothing else to do. She was different than everyone else. She was able to handle my dark and deep secrets. She was able to love me, every single part. We laughed and cried and wrote books together and went to all the school dances with our group. Now I'm a new student in the literal middle of nowhere, a senior without any friends, cutting again and lying about it to everyone- even my best friend. Why is it that I always end up alone, forgotten... disposed of, replaced? Why did I let her in? Why did I share so much of myself with her when all of our promises- no goodbyes, no lying, no forgetting- have been broken by us both? It hurts. It hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts. I wanna go home. I want to feel safe and warm and secure. But I'm terrified and cold and there is nothing to anchor me down except my own depression, the blade in my hand, the blood on my legs, stomach, sides, the pain. Wow. The only constant thing in my life has been pain. No wonder it's what makes me feel better. Isn't there a saying? Sometimes what's hurting you is the only thing that makes you feel better...
If you see a comment that is unsupportive or unfriendly, please report it using the flag button.
More Posts
-
Gusto ko ng mawala/magpakamatay
Hindi ko maexplain yung nararamdaman ko, basta ang alam ko lang gusto ko ng mamatay, hindi ko alam bakit ko ito nararamdaman, sa sobrang lungkot ko gusto ko ng...
-
Please give me some advice or reassurance......
Guys...I need some advice. Due to bullies making me lose self-esteem and confidence, I now can't approach a classmate without having an anxiety attack. Ther...
Thats a lot you are going through. And trust me, i have too so i understand. I think you need to get over her because she clearly has. I know its hard but you will find someone who will listen to you and care about you. I know it hurts a lot but you have to stay strong. If you need a shoulder right now, i swear i could try my best to listen to it.
Just stay strong.
Replycall her and tell her. she already knows your past, so tell her the rest. just because you lose contact with someone doesn't mean you have lost friendship. if she calls you tomorrow and tells you she is falling apart, wouldn't you go? no questions asked?
i have friendships that have lasted for years. we were very close at one point. we talked all the time. we would tell each other our life's story. now, i haven't talked to them in years. but i know if i called them and asked them for help, they would come. and, they know it would be the same for me.
your friends shouldn't be your entire world. they are a part of it, but not the whole of it. they are your support, not your crutch.
don't just let your friendship go. the kind of change in a friendship you are talking about doesn't always mean your friendship is less than what it was in the beginning. talk to her.
Reply