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its been a while since ive been on here and i feel that this site is helping me express my emotions that i didnt even know i had. I moved from england to canada when i was 12. That is what first caused my sadness. im 16 now and i still havent gotten over the move. I got a little bit better but lately ive been really sad and to the point where theres tears flowing out of my eyes and im not sure why. i think its because im more empty or numb than sad now. But thats makes it so much worse because when your sad at least you can feel emotions. Now im just empty and want to isolate myself from the whole world.
Moving countries really did a number on me because i had dreamed of a future back home and now im in canada and i really dont like it here. Its been 4 years since the move. No one knows that im soo homesick and that i cry myself to sleep every other day. Just thinking about england and all the friends and memories i left behind kills me internally. Im currently sobbing all over my laptop. Theres nothing i can do about it now. My family loves it here and consider it the best decision they've made however ive tried to tell them how much i hate this place but they dont get the hints of how depressed im getting. i have made a lot of amazing friends in canada however i cant stop thinking of what i have left behind.
the friends i had in england were so close to me and now we barely talk and they have all moved on. Some of them even forgot my birthday but i have never forgotten there birthdays because the only thing i think about is my life back in england. the fact that there forgetting me hurts so bad that i want to die because i have some of the best memories with them that i think about daily. the saddest part is that no one knows that im dying inside. and i dont want to fake depression but i dont know if im just sad or if im getting severe depression.
i just need someone to talk to please...
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Hey... Don't worry I'm here, I'm always here to talk. Although, I've never been to England before. But my accent is pretty much somehow Brit? Anyway... I know moving from a different continent hits you very hard, I share your pain when I was 12 years old. It makes me want to tear up how bad you left something behind, and all the things we want most are absolutely gone.
I know how much it means so much to you going back to England, friends, memories, childhood moments. And all other plans that you want to construct with. I know my words will come out awfully to you, but being there in Canada. You're now starting a new beginning, new life, new memories, and friends, leaving your country doesn't mean your falling or dumping the memories with your best buddies or whatever may it so. I'm sure your friends remember your birthday, maybe they just got busy or having a hard time communicating with you for a little bit in a while. Apart from that don't take it so badly or how awful moving out of the place, you can start a memorable one and how marvelous there in Canada, maybe one day when you head back to England. You will tell your stories about how much life in Canada is amazing or how awfully cold there...
Don't take it personally that you'll be staying in Canada forever! You still have a long way to go! Just tell them moving in one place to another is totally bad... Lol. If you are having a hard time. I'm free to talk every day if you want, Lol. I'm your just a bit younger to you, probably three years apart from me. But don't worry about it!
ReplyHeyy...ur feelings are valid! Moving places is really hard. You've been really brave all this while. About the people you left behind, I'm sure they love you and cherish your memories just like you do, but people get busy, so they probably just got carried away. There's absolutely nothing wrong with you. Crying alone sucks. I'm sorry u have to go through that. Take care of yourself...give yourself time. It'll be alright. Idk how this helps but I'm here to talk to you n listen to you❤️❤️
ReplyI remember you and I answered your post before. What you should do is get a job and save for your fare back to England. This gives you something to look forward to. However, when you return you might miss Canada and want to return there again. I say this because people from England come here to Australia and miss England and go back but then they miss the sunshine and beaches and other things here and come back here again, and then miss England and go back there again and continue like this. We call them whinging poms. When they are here they complain about everything here and when they go back to England they complain about everything there. There is even a joke that the whining noise a plane makes as it comes in is all of the whinging poms on board. My grandmother was from England and she was forever saying, "I want to go home." But she never did.
ReplyHey there! You can talk to me... I know change can be very scary and it's really awesome you made new friends in Canada. Not me but my best friend changed cities when she was 15 and all this she told me later, she would cry everyday straight for 3 months because she hated the school...her old school was better at all levels than this one. We met at the new school and even though we were her only for 2 years (end of high school), those were the best 2 years of our entire school life.... She still kept contact with with her friends from old school
You think you are missing on the fun you would have back in England but think what new things wait for you in Canada...give it a try... genuinely try to mingle and participate in activities, you will love...you still have a year in high school, enjoy the most as a senior and trust me...you will love it...connect with your old friends from time to time...not always ranting how you miss them or wish to be there but just share what you did here and they'll share what are up to....
Trust me give it a chance..
ReplyYou can go back someday, you're not stuck in canada
Reply