I often think...

I often think why I stayed with you so long. Sure, it was only three months, but I wish I never had dated you in the first place.

You were overly jealous, clingy, manipulative, emotionally and verbally abusive. You would get mad whenever I talked to anyone else. You would get mad when I had to focus on my studies. You would want to know absolutely every detail of my life.

I often think about all the questionable things you did. When I told you I was going to bed and needed you to leave, you said you'd stay and watch me sleep (wtf, no, leave). When I took a 3-hour nap after work, you called me 10 times and texted me how "it hurts to be ignored." When I was going swimming with my friends, you pressured to see pictures of me in my swimsuit (no, thanks). When I drank with my friends, you texted me all night pouting that you weren't invited. When I tried to break up with you the first time, you said that you would lash out on me and never speak to me again if I did...

So I didn't. But ten days later, you only got worse and so I had to end it. You said you'd have to stop talking to me, but then you didn't. You made assumptions when I went hiking with my guy friend - that I left you for him. You made assumptions that I was sleeping around. For weeks, you blamed me, attacked my character, and made me believe I was a terrible person. You tried to get back together with me, but I said no. Absolutely no. Never. Never.

I often think about that one night I told you to stop talking to me for forever. You lashed out, saying how selfish, rude, and terrible I was. You tried to manipulate me, saying how much I needed you and how I do nothing but hurt people. You tried to make me apologize for your actions.

No. Don't ever speak to me again.

I often think about how I feared for my life that night. When I hid in my closet for 30 minutes because I was afraid you were going to come to my apartment and hurt me because what comes after emotional/verbal abuse is physical abuse.

I often think about how you reached out to me a few weeks ago, saying how sorry you were and how much you think about me. A pity message that received none. I never want to see you again in my life. I proceeded to block you on every platform and while I wish the best, my best will never have you in it.