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When I'm around my friends I feel detached like I'm an alien. I stiffen up becoming anxious and awkward. I don't know how to be a part of the group I feel like I'm a different species. I often retreat by talking like a mature well-mannered adult. I feel like a burden to my best friend when she invites me to things and I can't loosen up. I thought I was getting better with my anxiety but I'm realizing it's gotten worse. It's like I have no social skills. I just hate feeling so so anxious around my friends. To top it off I have ADHD so I always miss things being said and forget stuff and GOD I really really don't want to mess up. I never stop feeling out of place like I don't know what I'm doing or how to stand or sit or breathe or blink or drink or eat or when to talk. There's no rulebook. I hope I'm doing these things right. I hope they aren't annoyed by me. What do I even do?
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I have ADHD as well, and I get it. I would say that you should open up about how you're feeling. Make sure you aren't explosive, because I have a friend that expresses their feelings explosively, and it's not a nice feeling. Just be clear about how you are feeling and everything will be alright. If it's not, I give you free permission to slap me virtually.
ReplyYou are doing okay so far so just be yourself.
ReplyI have the same situation...
ReplyI feel the exact same way. Everyone around me is so natural and in place but I look stiff and awkward and feel like there's judgy eyes on me all the time.I don't know what to do with my hands. I can't walk right, I can't sit right, I can't eat right, I can't even order my own food and when my friends want to take pics with me I just look so stiff and awkward. It makes me feel so out of place because I've never met anyone who has as bad anxiety as I do. You're not alone.
ReplyI feel the same way. The difference is that I can actually talk to my friends when I am with the group But after the conversation, I don't feel comfortable. I feel like I did something bad sometimes I regret what I did or what I said. Every time I hang out with my friend, after meeting them I was quietly thinking what I did in every detail. I always think their expressions towards the words I'm saying and I end up with having these negative thoughts. Sometimes, I cried. I think I should stay away but I don't want to be alone.
Thank you by the way for your story, It encourage me to open mine.
Reply