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I’m trying so hard to be your perfect happy little girl but it’s kind of hard to smile through your mental abuse. I wish I could just leave but of course I still have a couple years before I can move out. Your driving all of us away. Dad just drinks his feelings away and mom blames us. You ask me why I don’t talk to you about the things I like, it’s because I do something that takes hours and I’m really proud of it and I’ll go show you and you either ignore me or you just say “mhm”. When you found out I was cutting all you could say was “ that could kill you so you should stop” then you just walked away? Do you even care? You say we’re not even a family just a bunch of people living there own lives in the same house, yeah that’s true but did you ever ask me how my day was? Did you ever ask hey what did you do in school today? Did you ever ask me if I want to do something with you? You didn’t even let me see my biological mother or her side of the family. You used that fact that my mom Left me as something to scare me, I remember you would tell me if I didn’t do this or that you’re going to leave me and never come back, you’d get in the car and drive for a while then come back and I would be scared and crying so then I’d listen. That’s probably why I got anxiety and panic attacks. You don’t even care about that you took me off my medicine for anxiety and panic attacks randomly and when I asked if you if I could go back on medicine you ignored me. I hate this city, I hate living in this house and I’m stuck here. The only person I have left is moving over 1000 miles away and she’ll find someone better and forget about me. My sisters are moving out to a different state. And I’m here. I don’t know what to do anymore
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