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I seem to have turned my leg into a checkered pattern.... you cut one way then the other. Ha! It's kinda funny looking. Seriously children don't start selfharming... that shit goes from like 3 tiny cuts to like thousands of deep cuts and scars. It gets more frequent. It gets deeper. You get numb to it. You won't feel like you can stop.
Ah shit why do I do this? I'll never be able to wear a swimsuit... I'll have to buy some long swim shorts or something. I mean not that I can swim....
I officially give up on life....
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My name is nobody.
I'm 20 years old. I'm too scared to identify as gender fluid and use they/ them pronouns. I'm worried all the time that I'm insane. I use a razor blade to self...
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I need to...stay loyal to...cutting?
So, I felt this weird thing about two years ago and I've been feeling it again lately, (since...November I think? Maybe?), but I just had some sort of epiphany...
I know self-harm scars are generally seen as mistakes, but they don't have to be. You can wear a swimsuit. You can wear shorts or a skirt. You can wear a dress if you want. They don't have to have a negative connotation. The point is you're still here. The point is that you went through something nobody could ever begin to comprehend and survived it. You are worth it. And you are worth this life. Scars tell a story of where you have been, what you've been through, every detail of your life. They aren't something to be ashamed of, you fell, everybody falls. They have their own scars from their own journeys. Embrace what you cannot change, embrace that despite every hardship you have faced, you're still here. You did not come this far to not go farther.
- Miana
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