What are you looking for?
What if I've just messed up too much now?
2 months ago · · virginity,
So, a couple months ago I was really going through it, I still am - but I realise I am now, at that time I hadn't realised how messy my head was at the time. And I did something really stupid, I'd just broken up with someone and I was so scared and not really thinking properly and I started hooking up with someone just as mates, and I thought we were genuninely mates. It happened for a few weeks and then I stopped it, and then a while later, he messaged me and I went round and I lost my virginity to him. And I was okay with that, because I thought it would really break me if I had lost it to someone who I really loved, even though I did care about this guy. And then after he just changed, he just didn't talk to me anymore, and there's all this derogatory stuff about girls on his pages, and we're not friends anymore. And I feel so stupid, because he probably thinks I'm this massive slag, and that I'm not worth it now I've done that. I'm scared that because I did that nobody else is ever going to want to get with me because I'm not a virgin and I'm so annoyed at myself for letting myself get treated and used like that. And I keep trusting people who I think genuinely care about me (has been like two, not that many) with my nudes, and him with my body and then they just show their true colours and I feel so stupid. I don't know how to forgive myself, I feel so dirty, and I feel like my body is worthless now.