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I love the holidays because during that time of the year, my immediate family and I would go home to my dad’s place where our extended family resides. In the airport, my grandfather would patiently wait for our arrival. It’s been like that ever since I was a baby. We did not have the chance to go home last 2020 because of the pandemic though, so our last visit was 2019. I was looking forward to the holidays this year but now I don’t know what to look forward to. My grandfather has recently died due to a sudden heart attack and it pains me so much. I cry randomly thinking about it. I don’t know who I can talk to about this because I feel like nobody understands. Him dying feels like the end of something that I have always looked forward to. I miss him very much even if we barely talked as the awkwardness grew due to age and language barriers. Nonetheless I loved him dearly and I am very grateful for everything he has done. If only I were given the chance to spend another Christmas with my family complete and with him still alive and singing songs, I’d take it in a heartbeat. I miss him. I really do.
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