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he broke up with me Saturday. its been 2 days. and we still call and text. it is more me than him, but he called me the night he broke up with me. he called me saying he was sorry for everything, and he still loves me. we texted a little that night but it was so hard not saying "I love you" because I knew he wouldn't say it. he called me the next morning, saying he didn't understand why he did it. neither of us understood. even though he lied and didn't treat me like I deserved, I still want him. I don't know how to let go. we called last night. I had to act like everything was fine. he didn't seem upset. there's a lot of unsaid things between us, and we both know that. he texted me at 2am saying "im awake and I cant stop thinking about you." I immediately texted back asking him why he did what he did and that I cant do anything without thinking of him. I feel empty. he didn't respond to any of the 3 messages asking why he did it. the only thing he responded to was thanking me for sending a picture of his mail that was sent here. he has everything here. his clothes, important papers, memories. I asked him once again why he didn't respond, once again no answer. I tried to call because that's the only thing I know how to do. he's my comfort person, and I cant hate him no matter how much I should. I want to talk to him about this, about everything. no answer from him either on the call, and I got a message saying "do you want blocked." I don't, I wouldn't even know what to do if I got blocked. I want to call him so bad, but I know that won't end well. I want to talk to him so bad. he just makes me feel so much better, even though our calls don't end with the usual "I love you". it hurts so much, I want him to call me, but I just want answers. I don't have any closure, he's not home. I just want to see his face, to hug and kiss him one last time. I don't know if that will ever happen. he's trying to avoid me because he knows what he did is wrong. he knows I'm hurt, and he's going to realize how good he had it with me. I want him back, and I just don't know how to let go. he doesn't seem upset, but he's always been good at hiding that. I know this takes time, and right now the only thing that would make me feel better and keep going is hearing from him and seeing him. I just want that. its so hard to let go
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hi, i miss you
hi, kumusta ka na? mag-iisang taon na simula nung huli kitang nakita. alala ko pa noon na magsasabay pa sana tayong umuwi sa huling araw na magkikita tayo. pe...
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Just looking for advice
Looking for kind words of wisdom from people who have gotten out of relationships they thought they’d be in forever... looking for the light at the end of thi...
he is going through something. and he wants to keep it to him self. he did not mean to hurt you at all and he still loves you, he just cant love rn something is going on with him, show him that you are worried about him, do not show him how much u miss him.. It gets annoying. Im a guy btw
Replythank you. I tried to ask him Saturday night what was wrong because I could just tell by his voice. he never told me, but he still called me the next day and texted. I try to let myself just wait for him to text or call but it is so hard. I definitely know i'm annoying at times. I just feel like if I wait for him, that text or call will never happen, even though I know I need to just wait.
ReplyNames Marcus by the way.
Be straight up with him love, ask him if he wants you texting him, tell him not to lie.
If he says no.. Listen to him
If he says yes, he is not lying. Call him every day just to ask him how was his day and if he's okay.
Make the call short and leave him to himself.
Guys do not open up easily unless they know that they can trust you.
But during the call do no say I miss you or I want u back or any of that romance shit.
Be a friend to him. as much as it hurts you gotta be a friend to him. Make him see you don't mind about the breakup but u do mind if he cuts u out bc u generally care for him as a family, not a bf. I hope ur not too clingy though, and cry all the time to him bc he might just be fine and feeling bad to hurt ur feelings. But that is not the case. Update me this is fun helping girls out.
ReplyWell we talked last night, for about an hour.
About half of that was him yelling at me, for something I didn't even do. there's a lot about our breakup that I left out. I've been by his side through everything especially the arguments and falling outs he had with his mother.
I have never once lied to him. he knows that. but his mother tries to make everything worse. she has always been nice to me, but him and his mom haven't talked lately. I texted her on Saturday, when the breakup happened. I thanked her for being kind and letting me stay in her home when I did.
I was thanking her and being nice, and said she probably won't be seeing me around anymore. That is basically all I said.
Apparently his mother told him I said something about money and that he owes me a bunch of money, which is not true. I never once mentioned anything about that. His mom never responded to my message, and I decided to delete the conversation as I didn't need it any longer.
Before he found this information out that isn't true, he said he was going to originally call me to try and get back together with me. our relationship isn't perfect, he said things that hurt, and said things about my family but I still have hope.
He said I "ruined his life" when we both know that isn't true. He knows I've been there for him, but he lets his anger get in the way of everything.
Ive tried to restore the deleted message in hopes of showing him he was lied to by his mother and to know that I would never intentionally hurt him and "ruin his life."
He still doesn't understand why he did what he did. I try to check in on him. I ask him how his day is. I still wait for him to call, but I know he is angry still. I just wish I could show him the message, and that what I said is not a lie, and for him to not be so angry over something I never did.
ReplyGoodness, you sure left out a big scoop. He is angry. Do not take it out on your self-love, We handle sadness with anger it's just something that we do. He is not angry with u, he is angry at everything. and one thing a guy needs when he is mad is someone to help out with the anger. When I get mad I call up one of my boys and we go and throw rocks in lakes and work out sometimes we scream. When I used to get mad my ex would always come over no matter how annoyed I got or how much I cussed at her or pushed her away she didn't care she stayed. She gave me been bags and made me throw them at a wall. Then she insisted I go out with her as a friend. She ordered us food from the drive-through and she paid and then we went to an abandoned warehouse and broke things, then we had sex. long story short she helped me with that anger. She did not fight back she helped me release it. I thought she cheated on me so I broke up with her but it was a lie from her ex-best friend to get me with her. God, I miss her. she passed away a month ago. I was a fuck book, cheated on every girl i was with. was a bully but she changed me. you can do that to him. Do not blame his anger. help him
ReplyHe has always let his anger get in the way of everything, and I try my best to help him. If I could go see him and help him I would. He's in Florida, and I'm 1000 miles away. we are both young. I know I need to help him, and his way of coping with his anger and sadness right now, is drinking and sleeping. he drinks his sorrows away, and he calls me right before he starts drinking. he isn't always the happiest when he calls me and is sober, but I know not to let that get to me. I know he is angry. he starts drinking and immediately lightens up, I guess that's what alcohol does to some people. he drinks all night, sleeps most of the day, and wakes up and does it all over again. I want to be there for him, even though my family says I shouldn't talk to him, but we are each others comfort person. When he starts drinking, he says he loves me, and I know he still cares. he knows he messed up, and I try my best not to ask him about it again and again. Once he starts to realize what he says, he says he "doesn't care about anything" and is "happy with life", but I know he's not happy. he's all by himself. that's never been good for him. he lets his depression overwhelm him, and he drinks until he passes out. I have never once left his side, even when he is mad at me and says mean things. I don't care about that, because I know it's anger. he needs me to talk to. I want to help him, I want to be there for him, and I wish I could go see him. Everyone is saying I need to not answer his calls and not talk to him but I know I have to. I let him call me first, because I know he needs me and wants to talk to me. I'm extremely sorry about your ex, it sounded like she really helped you.
ReplyDo not listen to anyone. Be his friend, not his girlfriend. The last thing a guy needs when he is hurt like that is a girl. I'm sorry if that offended you in any way I just want to give you the truth. Tell him you want to be there for him as a friend. Call him first. Talk to him. And when men are drunk they tell the truth so he does love you. and he misses you. how old are you? can u drive yet. how far do you live from him like what state. I promise I'm not a stalker I'm just bored and I love to know about things.
Replyno offense taken, i’m 19. yes i can drive but i live in ohio, quite a long drive. i could fly but i know that won’t go over well between me and my family
ReplyAww, I feel so bad. I'm turning 19 May and I live in Beverly Hills Michigan. Then make him a vlog and send it to him he would like that. Or order him something on amazon to his house. Or order something for him like door dash and surprise him. The little things matter. I used to do that all the time when I and my girl were long-distance. I would call a restaurant in her area and order the food for her and they would pick it up and bring it to her house. I would let her eat it first make her blam how good it was then I would say it was from me. I did that for a week stright. but ofc you could do anything but surprises help.
Replyit’s almost like he forgot he broke up with me, or is denying it in his head. he called me last night. before we ended the call he said “i love you bye.” and i know he’s got stuff going on in his head and personal issues and stuff but he regrets it. he moves around to different hotels, so i don’t really know where exactly he is. i want to surprise him but it just seems so difficult when i don’t know what his reaction would be or what exactly he wants. i don’t know, there’s just a lot of confusion happening between him and i.
Replythat is the worst. Im sorry, it bugs me when I can not help. :l
He will get better but not atm. make I ask how old he is.
Replythings are already looking a bit better, but that changes day to day depending on what’s happening in his life. he’s turning 19 at the end of march. we both said that we want to eventually get back together. we both still love and care about each other. i think the time apart we have now will make us stronger and we both need to learn to be better versions of ourselves on our own. i know my family and friends don’t approve, but they only know the bad. no one knows him like i do. we both need to grow on our own in order to hopefully work out later on because the spark is still there.
ReplyI'm so glad things are getting better, Just make him feel better than he felt when you guys were together. :)
Replyits going well so far, we occasionally talk, and I think us being apart is good for now. we still both feel the same towards each other, but we aren't constantly involved in each others lives. he is doing his own thing, figuring out his life, and im focusing on school and seeing my friends and spending time with family. we joke around a lot with each other, and im feeling good about how things are going. I just know when I see him again its going to be great and I think our relationship will be better and healthier. I think we are figuring out how to be our own separate people during this little break.
Replythat's amazing. so glad u got to share ur story with me :)
Replythanks for responding and listening, it’s always nice to hear a different perspective and advice
ReplyOf course any time.
Replyme again! well things went downhill for no reason and he stopped talking to me and blocked my number and snap. it was all out of the blue last night. pretty sure he was with someone and proceeded to block me and threaten to blackmail me, when all i did was respond to the snap he sent me. things were fine last week between us, even just 3 days ago. but he changed, maybe he didn’t and was just faking it to make me feel better. but all hope at whatever i was waiting for between him and i is gone. i don’t know what happened but apparently he’s had enough of me. he went from calling and texting every day to 3 days ago when he started hanging out with friends just completely change and not text or call, and he always made sure to do that.
ReplyI told u this was gonna happen :/
I know guys like for christ's sake I am one, and I told u not to talk too much to him and to keep ur distance even if he texts u.
Guys find girls annoying if they don't love them. Even if he says he loves u he has to show u.
He just wants to move on and never have to think of u.
Read what I wrote again and take it in.
Cry if u have to. ut guys like that are fucking dogs who do not deserve shit. You go be happy and move on slowly and listen to happy music and ignore the fuck out of him.
If he tries to add u back or call u or anything text him back and say "fuck off" and period. U deserve better. and u sure as hell should not cry over him. And u don't need anyone to make u happy, do not go crying or telling someone how sad u feel. u need to know how to make urself happy and he is toxic. I have known guys like that my whole life. Please smile and try ur very hardest to get over him.
Delete all his pictures everything that reminds u of him and I swear it ill work.
Reply