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I let him go
1 month ago · · Need Advice,
I met a guy at work , and we’ve been chatting and talking for almost 2 years. We became friends and he confessed that he wanted me to be his girl. I gave him a chance to know me deeply but it wasn’t courting. Everything was casual but he exerted so much effort in the span of 2 years. He was consistent, and that made me feel so grateful to have him in my life. I know that I’m starting to really like him , and apparently he asked me if he could court me just recently. Everything was going fine but something happened. He lied. It was a fun sunday night, our mutual friend and I planned to have a sleepover at my place , and we’ve thought of having a video call in messenger together with this guy that I’m talking about. We tried to call him but he didn’t pick up the call. After a couple of hours he message me and apologized that he wasn’t able to join us. He said he was with his family, and they went somewhere. I heard a lot of stories from him, and he even sent a picture of the place.. But I knew, he was lying that time. I had a gut feeling that he wasn’t telling the truth. And I was right. Our mutual friend confronted him about the picture that he sent to me because she saw how stressed I am as I was really doubting his words. He confessed to us. We got so disappointed of course. His explanation was he was really not in the mood to join our video call that time because they had a small fight or arguments at home. He couldn’t tell the truth just because he doesn’t want us to feel pity about him and affect our mood that day.. He message me in Messenger and even at work but I couldn’t talk to him for 5 days.. I was so hurt and disappointed. I couldn’t understand why he had to lie that much about that thing. I tried to understand his situation and calm myself but I couldn’t tolerate it. For me it was still a lie. After 5 days of figuring out of what I should do, I finally made up my mind. My trust was ruined and I started to doubt my feelings towards him. I was hurt and I frustrated. That small lie ruined everything... He tried to fix it and ask for forgiveness. He wanted to take back what he did to me. He was crying and constantly reminding me that it doesn’t define him as a person. That he is still the guy that I used to know. I was so frustrated so I ended it. After the call, he sent me a song that he personally wrote and sung for me... It was a song asking for forgiveness and understanding. He told me that he will respect my decision and choices even if he’s not included in it anymore... A day has passed and he tried to reach out for me. Telling me how he was really hurt too... I didn’t respond to him anyway..
I let him go that easy because I’ve got trust issues but I also feel this guilt and frustrations that I didn’t try to fight a little bit for us. That all of a sudden all his efforts just vanished. I am still sad right now and couldn’t focus that much at work.
I am still figuring out if what I did is right or if I should have tried to understand where he’s coming from...
I need your opinions or advices guys.
I hope someone will have the time to help me clear my mind right now...