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You never loved me to begin with.
they say all good things must end,
"I'll stand by you infinitely," you said.
I cry every single day, loneliness my only companion.
I cant understand the words I'm saying or whats coming out of my mouth, my words coming out like the vomit that my anxiety gives me.
The beating of your beating heart tortures my mind and body, for the hopelessness eats away, memories washed away with nothing else to in response to say.
I'm sorry I wasn't good enough for you, but I was bad enough that you wanted to leave.
If I just go now, will the pain stop?
but I fear if I do, I may never come out.
My anxiety is drowning me, and I cannot get away.
I want time to stop for some time,
even if it's only a day.
I cannot escape my insecurities and disapproval of others.
I fear sometimes,
I may never be able to get away.
I just want to say,
say I'm sorry. Sorry
for the inconveniences,
I may have brought upon you.
I was merely only trying to love you.
love is dead,
and I wish I was too.
If I said I was going to jump,
would you too?
I wish you could be the one that holds my hand,
the person to hold my hand when I just cannot take it anymore!
I slit my wrists and watch the blood slowly slick down,
cutting deeper and deeper until I pass out.
You are no longer here for me,
so what am I to do....
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ReplyI made this because these are the thoughts and actions of my own in my life, and I'm pretty much just tired at this point. my entire family even call my mental illnesses fake, and I'm only trying to fit in, so :)
Reply