What are you looking for?
1 month ago · · Suicidal Thoughts
2 years ago, I have this promise to myself that life will be over if I reached a certain age. I can't find motivation and inspiration in life. I don't have a problem with my family, it's just that I can't find a reason to go on, what for? I don't know where I'm heading to. I can't find a future for myself. I don't know why I'm here. Do I even have a purpose? Maybe if I'm gone, nobody will even notice. Nothings working for me. So why not put an end to it. What's the point of living. I'm not alone, I laugh and go out with my friends, but still the loneliness inside me is eating me up everyday. That's when I realized the feeling of emptiness. I feel empty. I don't know how to feel. What's the difference between happiness and sadness? I don't know, it's what I've been feeling all along. I can't talk about this with my family or friends. They always see the cheerful me on the outside, and this side is the very opposite. I don't want to bother them. Even after 2 years had passed, I still have the same thoughts. That promise time and date, is just 7 months away from now.