What are you looking for?
1 year ago · · Depression,
The truth, you want the truth? I’ll give it to you, I’ve felt like my family would be better off with me dead, it been almost 5 years of my fantasies of death and my family being actually happy piling up. It’s been 5 years since I’ve get like I could smile genuinely. It’s been 5 years since I last took a breath just to breathe, not to keep myself away from my dad’s gun chest. It’s been 5 years since I saw I knife and didn’t fantasize it going through my chest. It’s been over 3 years since I found out that there’s a chance that my dad isn’t my dad. It’s been almost 2 years since I’ve a had a REAL friend, and the sadist part, isn’t that I’m not even 15, isn’t that these facts are all true, it’s not that you don’t believe me, not that you don’t care, it’s that people think that I feel this way because it’s ‘cool’ it’s not cool! It hurts, and I’m never happy, I’m always wearing this mask! I tell you that I think that I’d be an amazing actress and you ask “Why?” I say because I cat everyday, you say, “yeah right,” and laugh it off. So here I lay, begging that someone take me far away, to where I can breathe without starting to tear up. Where I can smile genuinely. Where I can feel legitimate happiness. Or at least just get me some stupid pills that help, all I want is to feel somewhat happy. Well I’ve got to go, bye, hopefully just for now for your sake.