What are you looking for?
Featured Topics
Select a topic to start reading.
If you are in crisis and need immediate help, please call 1-800-273-8255 (NSPL) or text HOME to 741741 (Crisis Text Line). More resources.
Words are sharp, pulling apart that was never fully whole. Cascades of emotions and the immense under tow of every thought, caught between the glimpses of terror and the tears left unspent.
Unkempt, unholy the soul, refract all light, skewing the image. Twisted and contorted, this was never survival of the fittest, it was survival by any means necessary, sometimes darkness is necessary.
Left in the shallows of spilt blood, no tide could clean that cloth. No word could ever build back the innocence lost. Left to stare out into this world as apathetic and unfeeling as possible.
Until the records skip a beat, face the fears between, fight the war inside of these dreams. All that's ever wanted, all the things of need. Everything that's ventured, all the lack of gain. Every regret, upset, reset, every turmoil, moment of torture, it's torment, the darkest is still dormant, still residing, still presiding, as an iron thumb. Squash down the thoughts of escaping, the hope that some of this can be undone.
Time will never wait, history tends to blow up at the face as life tends to crumble at the base and it's baseless, it's faceless it's all the things I could never be or dare to dream and refused to see.
Armored against the horizon, every boundary set to stand still. Life and the real world collide and that's where it can really kill. All the time, all the pain, all the woe is me, all the more difficult it is to breathe. Yet refuse to move because to do so, life would stab you in the chest. Can't fall back, emotions will never let you rest. Can't see forward, the thoughts are never clear. Frantically searching, there's got to be a way out of here.
It doesn't matter how hard you try, how much you cry, how it feels inside, it just pries and pries until the cyclone is at full speed, swirling down into the abyss. Every memory scratching at regret, every emotion aching of loss, every single moment is another second I wear this albatross. Knowing full well, hearing the ticks of time, the mind finds only one solution and that answer is suicide.
If you see a comment that is unsupportive or unfriendly, please report it using the flag button.
More Posts
-
I'd Rather Be Real
I'd rather be real with someone than pretend. I'm not doing this hell all over again. I live my life curating an image. Pleading to God to free me of this...
-
rrr
Climbed so high only to have gravity pull you down. At the center of the universe and you’re only accompanied by the smell of raspberries and rum. All lif...
Mm. I've been to this place. Departed from it, as well. From this place that answer would appear as the only one. But there's not much light to examine such things in the darkness.
ReplyThis is beautiful. I can feel it too. Please. Don't leave. You're not alone. I'm still alive because I have a dream. Maybe you don't. Or maybe it's not enough to make you want to stay.
Either way, you're living for yourself. You are the center of your life. People aren't going to be with you forever, no matter who they are. Maybe they will be in your head, but I promise, you can choose to forget. Like I have!
Choosing to leave and forget some people can be good for you.
ReplyI've been putting in work and I can honestly say this feels like it was so long ago. Despite the fact that it's literally from last month.
It's been about a week now, or so, that these kinds of thoughts haven't been present in my mind. It actually brings tears to my eyes to see that.
ReplyIt's good that you're feeling better! You're amazing!
Reply