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I wish I was pretty
2 years ago · 3 · sad thoughts , +2
Ever since I was a young girl, my most prominent memories are of day dreaming that I was given 3 wishes by a magical forest fairy
My first two wish where always the same. “ I wish I was pretty like Sarah in my class and thin like Jasmine who everyone seemed to adore.
My second, “ I wish I had different parents”
My third I would always keep for a rainy day because the only thing my parents taught me was happiness, safety and love was never permanent. Having these thoughts when I was six was normal to me and I thought everyone had them. Now I’m 20 and catch myself still wishing some of these thing.
I’m angry...frustrated...and miserable. It’s not fair that so many of my friends and people I know got to have a childhood. I feel robbed and betrayed by the people who where supposed to love me unconditionally.
I feel hopeless...alone...I feel guilt for feeling sad. I feel like I can’t tell my friends how I feel when they just don’t understand why...
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Here's my thing. My cousin said something that made my grandfather angry. Until it reached to the point that my grandfather almost punch my cousin. He even told...
I thought you would be with me forever.I really wonder what's really happening with me and my life .I never asked you to talk to me. I never asked you to ente...
I know that no matter how hard people try, they would never understand you the way you understand yourself. I myself am just looking forward for the future, because I can never change the way my past was shaped, but I can always look forward to a life I believe I can control.Reply
When I was a child and told people I hated the mother I had they always said it was a terrible thing to say and I shouldn't say that. But I was only telling the truth. However, I don't carry this with me and go around feeling sad and bad about my childhood. People like me and maybe you who have to almost bring themselves up and face challenges and problems as children with no help from their parents have no problems as adults. They don't notice problems as they have learned exactly what to do when problems arise and pass over them.
You say that so many of your friends and others who you know got to have childhoods. Everyone had a childhood. Some had good childhoods, and others had bad or horrible childhoods. The ones who had caring and protective parents have problems all through their adult lives because their parents took care of issues for them when they were children. They didn't learn how to solve problems when they were youngsters. So at least your adult life is problem free.Reply
Hey some people may not understand you, but I understand you. You are beautiful just the way you are. I also had some experiences in life where I feel like love was always conditional, people don't have your best interests at heart, but learning to love yourself unconditionally is the first step. You are not your thoughts. If you're feeling angry or betrayed, those feelings don't define you. I know it's hard when we feel like we can't talk to anyone, but you're talking to me now. And I am here for you. <3Reply