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Hey so a long time ago, I was dating someone. We fell in love with each other but we were really young and so it was a hard emotion for us to learn to navigate. We were in school and things were really busy, and we got a little stressed out with the relationship because there was so much going on in each of our individual lives. Anyways, during this time we took a "one week break" because we needed space, and I was kind of starting to need time away from him. We got back together a week later and then a couple weeks after that, he left me. So I was heartbroken, obviously, but also confused because he wanted to be with me so badly while I was the one who was struggling to be in the relationship (I was really busy with school and my health and I wanted to take care of myself without distractions) but then all of a sudden, it was like he was the one who chose to leave. Our breakup was super hard on me, and I kept trying to talk to him because I felt like something was so wrong. Deep down, my soul was crushed and I didn't understand why. We just broke up, which to me is not a big deal..maybe it will hurt a little but it shouldn't feel like the world is crashing down on me and I shouldn't be feeling incredibly taken advantage of...why did I feel so betrayed and hurt? About seven months later, I hooked up with his friend after a party and he got so upset and started to say I was disloyal (even though we weren't together...) and I guess I understand to a certain degree but why was he so upset at me for that? He was extremely emotional and unsettled by it and it was more than half a year after we broke up and I was trying to move on and it wasn't even a big deal? Like I wouldn't even count it as anything because of how insignificant it was and also I was single?? So that was when my intuition kicked in again and I felt like something was seriously wrong...but I didn't have any information to understand what it was. We got into a few arguments over text because he refused to see me in person...and then eventually he confessed to me that he cheated on me while we were taking a "break" (even though I seriously feel like it was when we were still together). My heart was shattered but I felt relieved because finally I had a reason to feel what I was feeling. I felt so betrayed by him and finally I understood why. Then a few hours later he told me he didn't cheat on me and that he just made that up because I hooked up with his friend and he wanted to hurt me??? It was so weird. Anyways, I think he just chickened out when in reality he did cheat on me. That's what my intuition says. Does anyone have any advice on this? I blocked this guy because he's clearly really shady and didn't take my feelings seriously, tried to blame me and shame me for hooking up with someone while we weren't even together, while sneaking around behind my back when we were in a committed relationship. But am I on the right track with believing he cheated? Because why would someone say that and then take it back?
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He is very childish and was paying you back. You initiated the one week's break so to pay you back for that he left you. Then he was happy that you didn't have a guy until you got with his friend. Then to get you back for that and to be nasty he said he cheated on you while you were on the one week break. You had moved on and he hadn't moved on at all and he may have been telling the truth when he said he made it up about cheating because you had found someone else who was his friend and he wanted to hurt you. He felt that you didn't want him when you wanted the one week's break and he was hurt by that so he wanted to hurt you by leaving you and hurt you again when he found out you had found someone else.
Keep away from him and you might be better off by keeping away from all of his friends so that you don't give him a reason to do something to you again. Be wary of him.
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