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how do i be happy when im meant to?
11 months ago · · Stress,
today is my 18th birthday. i have not celebrated it or even left my house since i was 12 due to extreme fear of the world. i went to a psych ward three months ago, and i feel like i may be able to do things again. i'm still very emotional though; i cry when i'm stressed, have severe anxiety attacks when i'm alone or when i'm near a lot of people, cannot make decisions, and still can't speak to people. it's very hard for me to talk, especially since i don't talk much at home, and i have a very difficult time forming words although i can write just fine. but since i'm an adult now, people expect me to be normal.
i know this day is special. i want to take advantage of that. my family has planned out something that hopefully won't be too stressful. we're going to the mall, picking up some food to eat at home, and bringing a cake home. i won't have to interact with people much, but it will be better for me to be in the public at least (i think.) how do i do all the things i struggle with right? specifically, how do i become more comfortable in public settings? i am immensely sorry for wasting the time of anyone who reads this.