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I used to go to go to art classes with someone for three years. After that we went out together sometimes and I thought we’re friends. Then suddenly she posted photos of her engagement party and I’m like WHAT?! I always asked her how she’s doing and she never mentioned about a relationship. I asked her why didn’t you tell me and she said I posted a “story”. And now she has posted her wedding pictures..
All I’m thinking is that haven’t I been a good friend to at least get an invitation? I’m not a wedding person but she didn’t know that.
I never intrude and pester someone to share their lives.
I try to be nice and let that person be relax.
Now I’m thinking maybe I was wrong thinking she considers me her friend. Maybe I’m not a close friend. Or barely a friend.
I’m leaving out lots of details but this is my general feeling
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You have only known her for 3 years and have only gone out together a few times so no, you're not a close friend and shouldn't have been expecting an invitation to the wedding.
ReplyActually I’ve known her for 6 to 7 years now. So we’re friends, though you might say not “close” friends. Though we both go to work and we’re busy we always chat and send texts. We share each other our work progress. We bought each other birthday presents… I don’t what counts as friend!
That’s why I feel hurt. I never met her parents and never went to meet them, but I have met her brother.
Maybe I’m not saying it right.
But I know she’s not one of those whose friends with “everyone”.
ReplyCurious about the details that you left out? Seems like you thought you were close friends but she did not. When she said that she posted a story should have been your clue that she doesn't think of you like that.
ReplyI’ve known her for 6 to 7 years now. So we’re friends, though you might say not “close” friends. Though we both go to work and we’re busy we always chat and send texts. We share each other our work progress. We buy each other birthday presents… I don’t know what counts as friend if these are not enough!
I never met her parents and never went to meet them, but I have met her brother.
Maybe I’m not saying it right.
But I know she’s not one of those whose friends with “everyone”.
We used to go out a lot when we had classes but after that it became a once or twice a year since we both had jobs and took different classes again.
And you know what hurts? After her engagement I said let’s meet and catch up (since I don’t know what’s going on!) and she said it’s the holiday and relatives are coming and going and there’s coronavirus to consider… and now she’s thrown a wedding, and this time we were chatting the whole time! She asked me if I knew any places to go to for travel and I gave her lots of information… well you’re welcome for your honeymoon destination!
I feel stupid and embarrassed. I’m not the jealous type but I hate to feel used. I’m the “good” friend who knows so much, I’m the energetic one, the most talented, and I shared lots of things with her and this is what I get??
And you know what I’m thinking? I’m thinking if I got married I wouldn’t invite my friends either because I just don’t want anyone to be around and be done with it, but her wedding is a big one. Maybe she and her husband only thought to only invite close friends? After all she only posted few stories and…
This is not worth it.
I really hope she’d be happy.
And I hope in the future I could make better judgments
ReplyThis has happened to me. A friend of mine showed me one of the invitations she had made for her husband's birthday party. I wasn't given one. But karma came on her later when she was knocked over and she broke her hip.
A husband of another friend asked her if she had any friends at all and she answered "no". So I must have imagined that we were friends.
Reply