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You spend your days dreaming about a certain person. Remembering shared times. In the good moments time flies by getting to know them, yet when you're alone emptiness spreads. They don't care about you. They care about someone else. As if they've forgotten about you, you see them talking to someone else. Loving someone else. Mixed signals all around. Do they love you or not. Jealousy fires your heart. Why not me. They break up and your happy. You start talking again sharing a good moment, then all they do is talk about their lover and get back together. The same toxic pattern in and out. Caring you then forgetting you. You realized they never cared for you. In your eyes they were perfect. At first your hurt how could they treat me like that. When you took a step away you saw it all. Behind what seemed to be a nice, kind, loving person was lies, toxicity, betrayal, pain, sadness, jealousy, madness. Then you realize they never cared. You block them, unfriend them, try everything to get them out of your mind. Yet they left a hole in your heart. While you cried your eyes out they didn't care. To them you were nothing but a back up plan. So how is life so unfair. How do they find closure and forget you ever existed, while you cry your eyes out. Mind screaming, heart beating, eyes flooding. All thanks to them.
I have no good reason to be so in love with him. My heart still aches for him. I shouldn't be feelings this way about him. Like a dog I always go back to him.
Dear universe help me find closure and forget about him. Heal the wounds he left. Erase him from my memories.
-From a hurt lover
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Sorry you're going through this. I don't know any good advice but I think it's good that you can be honest that this guy was toxic and no good for you. I hope you find someone who actually cares about you.
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