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So my grandma passed away in January and recently my friend's grandma passed away and now I am going through it all over again he is not as affected he keeps saying he knows she's in a better place I believe that for my grandma too but it hurts because she was my mom for 12 years took care of me making sure I am ok. She was my grandmother that loved me no matter what and did it with a smile on her face. She was my best friend she knew everything she was my everything and when I lost her I broke in two and now I feel like it's happening all over again. It's hard to lose a important person in your life that had such a big role in mine. I have been having dreams about stuff me and her talked about and how it changes things now. I don't sleep and one song sends me to a bad place. I want to be better and help my friend but can't help when I am hurting. FYI I am an empath if you don't know that means it means that I take feelings told to me and experience it for myself so this was double the pain not once but twice and I have already been in that situation. Don't want to feel this way. I miss her everyday and pray she knows I love her.
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"Empaths" don't exist. Not in the way society seems to think. So your first job is understanding that and ceasing to hold yourself up to that imaginary standard.
As for the issues with trauma related to the loss of your grandmother, grief is tough. It's not just a one stage kind of thing. You're not just sad and then get over it. There are 5 stages to grief and each is different.
You sound like you're kind of in the denial stages subconsciously. That's normal. Having that exterior information from your friend and their loss seems to overwhelm you.
Whether you're empathizing with your friend's pain or projecting your own issues onto them. It causes you some distress.
So when was the last time that you really allowed yourself to open up about this pain you're carrying? Have you gotten into therapy for it at all? Do you have a support system that you can use to get those emotions out?
ReplyI kind of have a support system and yes I went to therapy haven't in year's but they even said I take others pain and bring it to myself which is somewhat the meaning of an empath there are different meanings behind the word. I take others pain as my own have my whole life. Been finding ways to help myself but if you are going to judge you shouldn't be leaving messages that are judgmental in a way because I feel judged by you now and I have my whole life, I don't need it in my safe space, A.K.A here.
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