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I have this aching feeling of being under constant danger. I feel so empty and scared. I believe in God but I feel doubtful. I'm suppose to be happy cause I have things that should make me happy. I just want to be alone. I want to go somewhere where nobody knows about me. I just don't feel like doing anything significant because I'm so tired – to be honest, I'm always tired. No matter how long I slept, no matter how chill I look like, no matter how many times I say that I'm okay – I am horrifyingly tired.
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You know, I feel the exact same thing as you do. I badly wanted to give up things for a long time already. There were times I tried to do it you know, but I feel like If I die, what about the things that I still want to do?
What about the effort of the people who have tried every sorts of things just to make me alive and well? I said so myself, I wanted to die in a way I have done something good to others because they have shown me acts of kindness even though I know myself that I don't feel anything anymore.
That just be it, even if there's no life left in me already, I want to leave when I have done the things I think I'm supposed to do and make up for the mistakes I made.
I know life isn't easy. I've been tested and I still am ever since I was a kid. I'm not saying you have to act just as me, or be responsible or whatnot, I'm just trying to say, even just for a little bit... appreciate life and make yourself happy. Make yourself feel better. Do better if you want.
You deserve that at least. You can rest, and be at peace with that. Take care, always. Whoever, and wherever you are, I feel the same way, even just for a little bit. Let's thrive together to this thing called life.
You don't have to care too much about others and care or overthink about everything. Be a little bit greedy and do things for yourself. It ain't easy I said so to myself. But hey, I still want to eat good food and buy things that I want and go to places I've never been.
How about u?
ReplyI feel you,, just be strong there
Days like these will pass
Maybe not rn but eventually we will be okay
Reply