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Can't Take It
9 months ago · · Brokenhearted, · Explicit
I can't take it, you can't take it. So why are we still ignoring each other like the Black Plague? Why does it have to be so dark and dreary where it used to be love, light, and happiness? You can't take that you hurt me, you can't take that things are the way they are, but you somehow continue like nothing is wrong while I lay awake all night wishing you could take it. I wish you could take the fact that you let me go and still I fight. I may look desperate or crazy but I truthfully don't care. I'm not desperate, I just don't want to lose the love of my life like this. I don't want to let you go. No matter what you say or do I cannot Bring myself to let you completely go.
I say I don't care to people who ask but deep in my soul I feel a piece of me is missing.
This wasn't just ordinary love. This is a love that could move mountains. A love worth fighting for. So baby, please, call me baby one more time. Come kiss me as passionately as you did the first night we spent time together. It had been almost 6 years since I heard your voice again. It was the longest 6 years of my life. I'm so numb I can barely bring myself to cry except in moments why everything hits me all over again.
I picture your hands on my skin and the way it felt like ecstasy. I dream of touching you again. I dream that you're still mine. I have pictured you showing up at my front door saying your sorry and you still love me. The most painful part of it all that brings me to tears is that I know that isn't going to happen. You're going to stay where you are.
You moved to this city to be closer to me.. You moved your entire life to be closer to me, then end it, but you won't actually say it's over which kills me even more. Like you want me to hate you. But I never could. I still want you, no matter what. You are the one love that everyone wants. The love that envelops my entire being.You own my soul, you will own my heart for eternity. I can't picture myself moving on because I don't thjhink anyone in this world could love me like you do. I don't think anyone can make me feel the way you do.
So for now, I will say I'm fine while I'm dying inside. For now, I'll leave you alone. But we will be together again. I know it. I feel it. You're mine and I'm yours, remember? Forever and always. Through thick and thin. But I guess I just love you more. I love you more than the stars in the sky. I love you more than any fight, any argument. I fucking love you. For you. Good and bad. Better or worse.
Do you remember the night we basically committed ourselves to each other forever? When we made up things we wanted to say at our wedding, but that isn't going to happen anymore. I'm broken and empty. I feel so goddamn empty without you.
Everything reminds me of you. I can't even hear your name without my heart sinking into my stomach. The songs we shared in special moments. I can still taste you on my lips. I miss it all, I want it all back. I know you do too. That's why you ignore, I ignore because I'm broken and you broke me.
I can't be without you, I don't want to be without you baby.
I love you more, even when you act like you don't love me at all. But I know you do. Stop hiding, stop running. Just be with me.. I want to grow with you, I want to hold your hand when I'm old, Sitting with our grandchildren. Just enjoying each other like we used to.
It's been a month and I can't take it anymore. I feel like I'm going to implode from all the emptiness. Like my soul has turned into a black hole of emptiness and darkness.
So, I love you baby. Just know that.. even if I will be without you forever when we were supposed to be forever. Just remember that I love you, I always will. You will forever own my heart. I may give pieces away some day, but you will still have all of my love.