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A thought comes when I'm catching my assignments. The thought makes more questions than actual answers. Actually I got this thought before today. I was counting my age and had a quick guess that I was at 1/7 of my total life expectancy. I didn't want to make it 1/5, it's too short. 1/9? Too optimistic. I am 13. I counted again, to make sure. Dang, if I used the 7/7 measure, I should be 91 years old in final. Isn't that too old? I never thought 7 times of my age would be that old. Will I survive till that age? On what age can I still be with my loved ones? It's too complicated, bitter, thinking that everyone will go to this stage of life; death.
Not long ago, I got a glimpse of memory. Thought perhaps? My late grandfather. He died about 3 years ago. Surely, his body has deceased. Where is he? Is he happy now? Thinking about it makes me terrified. Because I will go to it too, but most sadly, my parents will too. I just can't, my parents are too loving to leave me alone (I assume they are the one leaving first). I just couldn't help thinking about them, and me, or the people I loved; mourned by people, buried, but forgotten not long after funeral.
I should forget about it and continue finishing my assignments.
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13 is too young to worry and have anxiety. Worry is just thoughts about the future and anxiety are bodily sensations caused by thoughts. Worry and anxiety at any age is a waist of valuable time. There are much better things we can be doing. Just wanting them to stop or to go away does not work.
An endeavor to understanding ourselves and how the mind works can be helpful.
I agree, you should just finish your assignments and then have some fun.
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