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I'm pretty sure that most people can agree that thinking tends to be the route of most issues in day to day life, however this has been a particularly troubling time.
My issue extends to that which is the cruel mistress of social media and by extension the internet.
You don't have to tell me one thing or another about it being a matter of perspective, or hell even claim I'm some kind of older person with the typical view of " those kids and that damn internet" when in a matter of fact I'm at the forefront of a highly technical field which I do believe to give me a little bit of authority on the matter.
So in a round-a-bout way I come to my point of concern, the expansion of social media becoming the all encompassing beast it is, has me deeply worried for the progression of all things.
I have come to look deeper into the mechanics of such platforms, of course there are the content providers and the content consumers, at least that's the way most people view it, but I wanted to look further into the matter with regards the consumers, it has often occurred that within consumers it has become an irrational breeding ground for incredible amounts of hatred and pain, displaying what i can only perceive as some of the worst in humanity.
This, just to clarify isn't entirely from the view of an outsider, but rather a realisation about myself which I feel could be applicable to many more, I am obsessed in one way or another, my days are nearly fully dependant on social media and the internet, hours upon hours looking through the same things again and again, which I believe is the definition of insanity, that being as quoted somewhat ironically from a 1981 Narcotics Anonymous pamphlet stating that "Insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results".
As clearly as I'm aware of my obsession I am unable to help myself due to the very rut which I have condemned myself into.
If by some miracle I was able to set aside my copious recreational use of the platforms, my academic and professional progression is almost entirely dependent on such subject, once again condemning me to the routine I wish to escape.
That's enough about myself anyway, my point I wish to return to is the composition of media users.
The truthful composition is that most people are simply put decent and good people, however like most things desperation is its downfall, for example given everything as of recent (which to mention is an awful lot of "things") more and more people are to simply put lonely, people disassociated from anyone, roaming in the darkest depths and troths of their mind trying anything to feel something like the warm embrace of companionship, or righteousness.
To quote doctor-who of all things (give it chance its not a lost quote), "When you fire that first shot, no matter how right you feel, you have no idea who's going to die!" granted of course death is an extreme case, however I do wish to mention that has been a proven "side-effect" of the wireless toxicity we have invented.
People are only the "people" flawed and damaged, not a perfection in sight, however the fact that consumers are in such desperation to for a connection and contact, that being that metaphorical "first shot" just for the sake of being something is really something of a sorry state.
I would like to move on from "consumers" as an individual to evaluate the interaction with the providers of content, for the most part these people are fantastic, as something of a side note I struggle to comprehend how they go on, with such an environment, and as a further disclaimer I am aware there is good, it just seems to be fading as of late.
However, considering the consumer and providers interaction, there is such a powerful bond even if most would typically miss such a thing, I've started to notice quite a significant thing, that being an obsession, the fact that a seemingly random person sitting in the united states or anywhere else for a matter of fact, doesn't just become something "fun" to watch, but to many, many people they become "friends" with hundred maybe even thousands of people who they will most likely never meet in their life span, which from a naïve stand point seems fairly logical and not harmful in the slightest, but there's far more to such a relationship.
I'd like to point out the "hedgehog conundrum" which has some application to my further points.
Within the hedgehog conundrum, two hedgehogs are together huddling for warmth however, the closer they move together the more they get hurt from their spines.
This is typically utilised within relationships and I seem to find it perfectly suitable in conjunction with this circumstance.
For "providers", offering the patented and marketed "friendship" on offer creates pretty obvious financial reward, which is in no way of an insult to a creator or such, I appreciate that many providers do what they love because they love to do it, which is a mindset I myself do simply adore and at this point almost envious of.
On the other hand to the providers, the consumers are in the previously mentioned state of desperation, and I may very well be wrong in some regard about the state of desperation, however for the most part I do find that such an obsession (which I even find myself guilty of) is born out of some fundamental lack of fulfilment in ones own life, forgive the existentialism, but I profoundly believe that is why we find ourselves in such a predicament.
To surmise the interaction of the two social media we find a fundamentally unhealthy relationship, creating depressed creators, who I simply can not express enough remorse for, and for the content viewers who are on a social life line, trying to patch the wholes of their social experience that is life with the high tempo addiction that is content.
I am by no means a person that I would consider to understand the human psyche, or the complications of ones mind, however even in my own withdrawn and reflective state, I can see that no-one is winning at this level.
This kind of brings me to my next point which I believe I am a little more experienced within, which is the corrupt and unrelenting force which is analytics.
Having some experience with data security, and such I have a series of protocols in place, which some may consider a stage of paranoia, which given the frequency of panic attacks I've been having lately is very much a reasonable conclusion, however I do wish to share what I have discovered within my paranoid antics.
I wish to provide a simple example just for the sake of comparison, in that I went onto a well known trip planning site to look for something "fun" maybe a new café or something, anything to get me out of the mental "rut" I have been calling my home for several years now.
after this 1! and only 1 search I had indicators that 31!, 31! cross site trackers had attempted to find more about me, after I proceeded to almost throw up from feeling sick and panicking excessively (I know that's a pathetic reaction, but i simply can't help it).
Prior to my procedures, it occurred to me that every atom of my being had been snatched from me, added to an exponential spread sheet, and sold for the highest price, the fact that someone, I don't know who, and I don't know where, knows what food I like to eat, my favourite songs to listen to when I'm sad, or when I'm "happy" or hell even what I like to listen to while travelling, the fact someone knows, my own sexual preference better than myself, or the fact that someone, somewhere will be able to calculate when I'm more likely to be depressed because of family deaths.
Given all this I think you can understand at least partially why I panic so much over such things, which gives me the point as to why I'm having such a hard time with the internet at large and social media, in the fact I am physically repulsed by all that it is, yet after writing this, will end up scrolling mindlessly through Facebook and listening to music picked out for me automatically on YouTube, this is inevitably mixed with a degree of self hatred of course, but even given my issues, rationally considering all that has been provided, I'm having something of a hard time with it all.
I've written all I can stomach, and hope at least someone can understand me.
love you all
~w
citations and references:
(1981) Narcotics Anonymous pamphlet.
(2015) Doctor-Who : The Zygon Inversion.
(1851) Parerga and Paralipomena - Arthur Schopenhauer. [hedgehogs dilemma]
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