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It's laughable but screwed up. How do you wanna gut somebody (your own family member) like a fish (material wise)screw them over then turn around and play victim like you did no wrong and still want compassion. What do you call this ? A special kind of fukd up.
I'm so tired emotionally from all this stuff. Yes I'm angry bitter and wzht be vengeance ok from all the hell I've received from an abusive drunken drug addict so called dad. I still have nothing for him.
It'd be different if he came legitimately and said look I'm sorry for doing being this way I'll try to make it up to you the best I can please forgive me gone me another chance and I'll do my best to trwft you right and stop getting drunk and being mean to you all.
But no he just sits in there giving me the silent treatment FOR SOMETHING HE DID AND CAUSED ME TO BECAUSE SUPER ANGRY ABOUT LYING TI ME TO USE ME THEN INVALIDATE ME FOR BEING ANGRY THEN PUTTING DOWN SLANDERING ME AS WELL BEING AN AWFUL WICKED PERSON TO ME. YET HE JUST TALKED ON THE PHONE TO MY CRAPPY AUNT LIKE SHE WAS GREAT NOT CARING THAT HE TREATS ME LIKE GARBAGE. GOD I WANT VENGEANCE SO MUCH
YOU DON'T TREAT FAMILY LIKE GARBAGE THEN EXPECT THEM TO BE GOOD TO YOU IN RETURN IT DOESN'T WORK THAT WAY
Yes I'm so angry being treated unjustly by my own dad. I also want to email my aunt who said happy b day to mom about not telling me what they did to grandma everybody keeping silent about it but I'm afraid it may cause more harm than good. Idk what to do there. Still im so of dad's disrespectful treatment of me. If I could leave if gone asap like road runner but I can't I'm stuck in this hell. I know history will repeat as every month and I'll wanna murder dad again . You can't expect compassion for continual shit treatment I feel like I can't win here and it's near hopeless. Yes it's near Thanksgiving but who cares dad already ruined it. I feel worthless alone and unloved and suicidal too. It's ok me don't matter to anybody. if I did my social media would be lighting up like a Christmas tree but it's dead. Just a typical few likes nothing more. But other family is like oh look at us were so up on the social status were great were better than you ...when it's all pretentious.
Depression is hell. On top of abusive family and treatment every single day. Itd ok . I'll put on my mask n pretend to be fine as always. We're not having Thanksgiving anyway so what's it matter. Dad ruined everything plus didn't want to have it. I can understand now why others in my area offed themselves last year. I just want the suffering to end. Not actually end it.
I lied in my room all day I didn't get to sleep til 7 a.m.
Dad acts like he's mad for what he did to me wtf is wrong with him. I'm done with him. I want him gone from my life.
he's a screw over liar manipulator hellacious drunken drug addict. He pretends to be buddy buddy to you but once he gets what he wants he leaves you high and dry and says you figure it out not my Problem etc I don't care what you do. Loves drugs more than us. So I want far away from him. Mom defends him so what can I do nobody else wants in the middle to help me. Like my selfish mean spirited aunt c. Sigh I wanna give up ๐ theres not much point to life like this
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