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I do not how I developed it but it affects my life. I never made friends throughout school and would be deathly afraid to interact with others or respond to questions. The constant fear of what people think of me has led to a low self-esteem and other issues. I feel like my parents might have caused this on me, specifically my mother. I don't blame them but they have always been overprotective, too protective. They never let me out of the house or have "friends" over, or play with anyone. It was always just myself and so when I got dropped in school it was terrifying and I feel like I never developed sufficient social skills. I mean when I was older (like 12) I couldn't even order at restaurants because I was too afraid. Whether that's the reason, or any other reason, I want to overcome it and finally live my life peace but I dont know how or where to even start.
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Honestly, imo, consistency is key. I'm not saying you have to go out of your way and suddenly talk to 100s of people every day, but every day make it a point to go at least a little bit out of your comfort zone and talk to someone new or distant. Not even a full on conversation, but at least some small talk. Keep doing this and, you might always be a bit shy and there's nothing wrong with that, but at least you'll have some solid basic social skills to withhold you.
ReplyWell same here. Parents were overly protective and also abusive which caused me to push everyone away. But hey, i told myself at the end of the day... when I do leave my family, what the fuck am i going to do for myself? If i cant even order my own food or socialize with anyone which is NEEDED in a stable job/sport/activity. My advice to you coming from someone who turned RED just by continuing a conversation with anyone, keep having conversations again and again. Doesnt matter if youre embarassed, which is why next time you avoid the same mistakes in conversations. And believe that the person you communicate with, is just as nervous as you are because they don't know you!
ReplyJust to inform you, I just turned 18 and struggled with talking to people since 10. after 6 years of pushing myself, i practiced with aunts & uncles, teachers. I can have a conversation now with confidence and even when i mess up sentences i just rephrase them or move on because the other person wont mind. You'll get there, just keep telling yourself that. Like i did to myself!
ReplyDon’t push yourself to interact with people. They tend to be exhausting and overrated. Find other interesting things and hobbies.
ReplyYou don't have any confidence in yourself so build this up by looking in the mirror every day and telling yourself that you are a strong confident person who isn't afraid of being socially active. Keep doing this until you believe it.
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