I feel like I am not doing anything

Is it just me or that I feel stuck... I do have a job but since I got into this job I never really got a real task, I feel like I have been shadowing seniors and understanding work and being pushed from one project to another all the time. It' been almost a year but I feel like I am not doing anything. I feel unproductive and sad. I am not even doing anything outside work. I am not exercising or eating well, I am not investing my time in painting which I used to love, I am not singing like I used to do. Even if during the weekends I go out with friends I feel worthless, I hear all of them talking about how work's been hard and how they are assigned to this role and all and I can't help but wonder what the hell am I doing? Yes I am earing a certain amount each month but I feel like I am wasting my time. I know it hasn't been long and just as my friends say I should be happy that there's no work for me but I am not, I am not happy like this. I wanna work and earn cause I am working. I want my presence to make a difference. I feel stuck in a hole I can't escape from. And even though I don't matter they still wanna make my life hell when I am just asking for a few days leave. What am I supposed t do? You don't have work for me but you don't want me to have time for myself? Am I the only one feeling this way? What should I do? I feel I am capable of so much more than just sitting in front of my laptop the whole day doing nothing. I feel like I can invest my time to do something better but I can't just quit this one. I don't know what to do. Does anyone have any advice?