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Dear Bhaloo
When we met I instantly felt drawn towards you and I think you did too. That first day we both talked so much and by the time I left for hostle I knew that I like you. And I think you did too. Then you asked me out and I said yes. You knew it was hanging by a thread my relationship with my then boyfriend and you decided to conquer me and let him know I'm yours. I didn't stop you. I chose you. Everything was great you know. I loved all your surprises and gestures, the way you held my hand , the way your chest felt against my cheek, the texture of your beard.
I'm sorry that we started having problems. I'm sorry for being depressed and suicidal, for crying for no reason, for making you concerned. I'm sorry for being impatient and short tempered. I'm sorry for making you feel so bad with all the shitty fights. The itc day you know I made up my mind that I won't get angry with you anymore but I did not know that by that time you had already made up your mind that we shouldn't be together.
You almost changed your mind.
I've been in such a bad place mentally since the breakup. I really miss you. I know you think you will find someone better you know you are probably right. But no one can love you as much as I do. And I'll be whatever you need me to be. I know you love me too. It's really not too late to make it work you know. I won't take up much of your time. I'll be good. I'll be my best version just like you want.
Please come back. I love you. It really hurts. Really really really hurts. I could feel you all over me. I don't want anyone else. Please come back.
Last time we met you slept on the other far side of the bed without caressing me for the night. It felt awful seeing you so sad and exhausted. I'm sorry for whatever wrong I said. I keep searching tarot shit on the internet hoping against hope that you will come back. I have messed up my sleep schedule, lost my appetite. I don't think I can keep up with this long. I feel like dying. I was holding onto you so tight and now you're not here and it's like my heart is shredding inside my body waiting to be torn from it. I love you too much to let you go.
Please stop being so cold hearted towards me. I can't take it anymore. All I want is to hug you tight hide in your arms. Just please come back. I'm so tired of crying and yet tears won't stop falling. I don't think I can survive this for very long.
Please come back.
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