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4 months ago · · family abuse,
This is my first time writing something of this sort. I am not in the most well of my mind as I am writing as I am still crying.
I am 13 years old, and I have been told all my life that I must love my parents. No matter what. But I simply can not do that. My parents are not the best people. At all. All life they have beat me, physically and verbally. This has been happening for as long as i can remember, with one of my earliest memories, if not THE EARLIEST, being me crying because of them.
To understand what I am going to say, I am autistic as well. One of those many symptoms includes pacing, wandering, running, whatever you will like to call it. I mostly do this while thinking. Whether this be for a good thought, or a bad one, I do this, and it cannot be controlled.
Recently about 30 minutes or so ago, I had been doing this running, and I had fallen on the floor. My dad’s reaction was to hit me in the face as hard as he could. He tried to tell me to control this, despite me explaining to him numerous times I could not. His response is he comes up with a plan that he will beat me, any time I show this symptoms. He wants to do this until I “learn to stop.” Correct me if I am wrong, this is quite literally abuse, however he has done this multiple times before. His reaction to anger is to attack me for it. Help.